Grey’s Anatomy’s Debbie Allen Has All the Scoop in Bonus Episode of Post-Op

Grey's AnatomyCatherine Avery in the house!
The 300th episode of Grey’s Anatomy my have come and gone, but the Grey’s Anatomy web series celebrating the milestone isn’t over just yet. E!…

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Why Grey’s Anatomy’s 300th Episode Was Record-Breaking in More Ways Than One

Grey's Anatomy 300th Episode, Ellen PompeoGrey’s Anatomy made history last night.
The long-running ABC drama, now in its 14th season, aired its 300th episode, making the Shonda Rhimes-created medical soap the first series in…

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Grey’s Anatomy’s 300th Episode: All the References You Might Have Missed

Grey's Anatomy 300th episode, Ellen Pompeo, Justin ChambersGet ready for an Easter egg hunt!
Grey’s Anatomy aired its epic 300th episode on Thursday night, and as promised, the ghosts of Grey’s past took over the hospital. And we loved…

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How Grey’s Anatomy Bounced Back From the Brink & Joined the 300 Episode Club as One of TV’s Most Prolific Shows

Ellen Pompeo, Grey's AnatomyIn the spring of 2005, ABC was on quite an upswing. Teri Hatcher was getting desperate on Wisteria Lane, while Matthew Fox was wondering just what kind of island he crash landed on, putting the…

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Will & Grace After Party: Episode 5

Leslie Jordan joins the party as the guest of honor and host Kristin dos Santos unveils bloopers and a sneak peek. After Party is a registered trademark of Buzzfeed, Inc.
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Lea Michele Reveals Expert Real Housewives Opinions & Least Favorite Glee Episode

Lea Michele, 2017 Emmy Awards, ArrivalsLea Michele has a lot of opinions and she’s not afraid to tell it like it is…about Bravo’s various Real Housewives shows. Michele was on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen alongside…

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"Scandal" Exclusive New Episode Sneak Peek

Olivia Pope is drawing a line in the sand for her new boo! See Olivia's reaction when her secret new man gets a little too comfortable in this "Scandal" clip!
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Lea Michele Reveals Expert Real Housewives Opinions & Least Favorite Glee Episode

Lea Michele, 2017 Emmy Awards, ArrivalsLea Michele has a lot of opinions and she’s not afraid to tell it like it is…about Bravo’s various Real Housewives shows. Michele was on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen alongside…

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Watch the First Few Minutes of Grey’s Anatomy’s Newest Episode of Post-Op & Reminisce About the Musical Ep

Grey's AnatomyRemember that time all of Seattle Grace Mercy West broke out into song?
This week’s episode of the Grey’s Anatomy web series Post-Op is joined by writers and producers Tony…

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Will & Grace After Party: Episode 2

Harry Connick Jr. teases his return and Kristin dos Santos keeps the celebration going with an exclusive peek at the third episode. After Party is a registered trademark of Buzzfeed, Inc.
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Somehow Friends Predicted the Plot of Netflix’s Emmy-Winning Black Mirror Episode

Black MirrorTelevision shows “predict” a lot of things, from The Simpsons forecasting Donald Trump’s presidency to Parks and Recreation and the Chicago Cubs winning the World Series in 2016. Turns…

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American Horror Story: Cult Episode 3: Killer Clowns? Chemical Trucks? What Is Going On??

American Horror Story: Cult, AHS: CultWe can officially add “being trapped in a coffin” to the list of irrational fears we now have thanks to American Horror Story.
Why does this show insist on doing this to us? What…

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American Horror Story: Cult Episode 2: Ally’s Losing It, and We Might Be Too

American Horror Story: Cult, AHS: CultWe wouldn’t call any season of American Horror Story “easy to watch,” but this season is truly pushing it.
Prior to this watching the first few episodes of this season, we…

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Star Wars: Episode IX director Trevorrow quits

Writer and director Colin Trevorrow has “parted ways” with the producers of Star Wars: Episode IX.
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Marvel’s The Defenders Episode 7: Fish in the Jailhouse Review

With The Hand threatening New York, The Defenders find themselves backed into a corner.
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Come and Watch the IGN UK Podcast Episode 400 Spectacular

The Sun is 400 times bigger than the Moon, but is 400 times further away from Earth, allowing for the illusion that they are the same size in the sky. In the Year 400 AD, the Great Palace of Constantinople was burned to the ground. The Four Hundred was a short-lived oligarchy in Ancient Athens, and a snobby social group in 19th Century New York.

What we’re trying to say is that the IGN UK Podcast turning 400 episodes old is a much bigger and more important deal than any of these other things. Which is precisely why we’re holding a big London live show to celebrate. You ever see a live show for the Great Palace of Constantinople? Suck it, Byzantium.

Alex, Alysia, Dale, Daniel, Gav, Joe, Rory and our newest recruit, Simon will be taking to the stage of Boondocks in Shoreditch, London on the evening of Friday, Sep 15 –  come and join us!

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Power Star J.R. Ramirez Teases Julio’s Big Episode: “It’s Time He Gets His Hands Dirty”

Power, J.R. Ramirez, JR RamirezIt it’s up to J.R. Ramirez, you won’t see Julio strip down on Power again any time soon.
Fans received quite the treat in a recent episode of the Starz drama when Ramirez’s…

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Game of Thrones: ‘Game of Thrones’ Season 7, Episode 1: A Tale of Two Maps

Picking up where the Season 6 finale left off, Sunday’s season premiere sketched out the contours of the clashes to come.
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The Real Housewives of New York City’s Latest Berkshires Episode Was Filled With Breakdowns, Fires and Revelations

Real Housewives of New York City, RHONYThe Real Housewives of New York City can accomplish so much in 44 minutes of television, it’s truly awe-inspiring. “It’s a circus of emotions,” Bethenny Frankel said about the…

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FULL EPISODE | People Now Wednesday May 24, 2017

Tributes pour in for victims of Manchester terrorist attack, plus the Jackson kids – their lives after Michael

Come back every day at 8:30 a.m. EST to watch People Now streaming live from Time Inc. headquarters in New York City, and rebroadcast at 11:30 am EST. Get the absolute latest in celebrity news, real-life people stories & the best of fashion and food.

Want even more? Watch clips from yesterday’s People Now.


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Star Wars: Episode 9 May Use Recent Carrie Fisher Footage

Todd Fisher, Carrie Fisher’s brother, says that the late actress will make an appearance in Star Wars: Episode IX.

Fisher told New York Daily News that the family has granted Disney the rights to utilize recent footage of Carrie for the last movie. The outlet additionally reports that CGI will not be used for her appearance.

He explained that in a conversation with Carrie’s daughter, Billie Lourd, they came to the conclusion that Carrie was too large a part of the franchise to not feature in the finale.

“She’s as much a part of it as anything and I think her presence now is even more powerful than it was, like Obi Wan — when the saber cuts him down he becomes more powerful. I feel like that’s what’s happened with Carrie. I think the legacy should continue,” Fisher said.

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It’s an Alternate Scandal Universe in New 100th Episode Promo (Plus, Did Huck Survive?)

ScandalScandal’s about to hit 100 episodes, and it’s truly celebrating with a bang.
And when we say bang, we don’t mean an explosion or a gun shot like we usually do. We mean…

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The Good Fight’s Most Annoying Episode Yet?

The Good FightIt’s almost like The Good Fight was created just to provide commentary about the current political climate. In “Social Media and Its Discontents,” Diane Lockart (Christine Baranski)…

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The Good Fight’s Most Annoying Episode Yet?

The Good FightIt’s almost like The Good Fight was created just to provide commentary about the current political climate. In “Social Media and Its Discontents,” Diane Lockart (Christine Baranski)…

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Yes, The Good Fight Just Did a Ripped-From-the-Headlines Episode About Law & Order: SVU

The Good Fight, Christine BaranskiPicture it: The Good Fight, The Good Wife spinoff on CBS All Access, doing a ripped-from-the-headlines episode about Law & Order: SVU’s shelved ripped-from-the-headline episode. What a…

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Big Little Lies Power Ranking: Who Came Out on Top in Episode 2?

Big Little LiesThis week’s episode of Big Little Lies has already gone up on HBO Go and HBO Now, since it conflicts with the Oscars, so make sure you’ve watched “Serious Mothering” before…

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Mariska Hargitay’s Law & Order: SVU Costars Reveal What it Was Like Having Her as Director on 400th Episode

Law and Order: SVU 400th Episode, Mariska HargitayCecil B. Hargitay is back. Law & Order: SVU star Mariska Hargitay stepped behind the camera once again to direct an episode of the long-running NBC series–but it wasn’t just any…

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Respect Your Elders And Watch This First Look At The 400th Episode Of ‘Law & Order: SVU’

Most TV shows don’t make it past the pilot episode, so when a series like “Law & Order: SVU” is still delivering after 400, especially in an era of shortened seasons and limited runs, it’s time to stop and celebrate. 

The long-running series reaches a major milestone this Wednesday with a brand new episode, and who better to direct than series star and executive producer Mariska Hargitay?

In this first look at “Motherly Love,” Lieutenant Benson (Hargitay) and Detective Rollins (Kelli Giddish) question a woman who claims she’s been sexually assaulted by her teenaged son’s best friend. But like most “SVU” episodes, somebody’s lying, and it doesn’t take the two long to realize there’s more to this story than meets the eye (dun dun). 

“I think we tried to write something that [Hargitay] could really sink her teeth into and get excited about and passionate about,” showrunner Rick Eid told The Hollywood Reporter about the episode. “We wanted to give Mariska something that we thought was complicated and highlighted her strengths as an actor, as a director and ultimately, something that was hopefully emblematic of the show itself, a worthy representation of number 400 that symbolizes all the show can do, has done and hopefully will do in the future.”

Watch a promo for the episode below. 

“Law & Order: SVU” airs Wednesday at 9 p.m. ET on NBC‎.

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Star Wars Episode I Basic 1999 Naboo Royal Security Action Figure

Star Wars Episode I Basic 1999 Naboo Royal Security Action Figure


Their freedom threatened by the fully-automated, invading Trade Federation army, Naboo Security Forces must battle terrible odds in order to save their homeworld. Note: This figure is on a C-7 Card.

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The Bachelor Episode 2 Recap: Nick Puts Himself Out There

We start with Corinne, the narcissistic rich blonde contestant who is “crushing really hard” on Nick, and could also be my daughter, if I had birthed her when I was 11, but that’s an aside.  The women get invited to the group date, which is cruelly titled “Always a bridesmaid.” There’s an interview with Danielle, 27, who is blindingly attractive so I don’t listen to what she’s saying, which makes me a chauvinistic dude at heart.

The women are told by the producers to happily race toward Nick, and they do, buoyed by youth, hope, and the desire to be wed to a hipster with tendencies toward romantic angst. The women are outfitted in different bridal gowns, while Nick says that he wants to see the women “be goofy” and have fun, which foreshadows that someone will take this Too Seriously.

The shark costume girl gets drunk again. Corinne brags about having kissed Nick during the first cocktail party, and is happy about her bikini top bridal gown until she sees another girl who is supposed to be either Eve or a jungle bride and is wearing only leafy bikini bottoms with her hair covering her boobs.  Thunder: stolen.

The photographer says that whoever has the best connection with Nick will get a surprise, which is either more time with Nick or a session with a therapist specializing in daddy issues, whichever a given woman needs more (hint: it should always be the second).

Jasmine kisses Nick during the shoot, which opens up the floodgates for the other women kissing him as well. Jasmine the ungrammatical mental health counselor kisses him tenderly and Corinne almost kills her. The girls discuss how Corinne is the only one who’s kissed Nick, and Liz, who’s already had sex with him, gloats to the interviewer about how she’s had sex with him. In case you missed it, she’s had sex with him. Sex. With. Him.

Nick’s photo shoot as Adam and Eve is very sexy, which makes Corinna insecure, so on her turn, she gets in the pool and TAKES OFF HER TOP literally, and Nick looks profoundly uncomfortable with this topless photo shoot in front of the other women. Holy balls, she just won the contest for being “most connected” with Nick, which isn’t fair because only her boobs were most connected with Nick. Her prize, sadly, is only another wedding photo shoot with Nick, rather than intensive outpatient therapy focused on Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

At the cocktail party, after telling the interviewer that nobody ever has or will hold her boobs the way that Nick did (really), Corinne asks Nick for alone time, during which she instantly starts making out with him as per usual. She takes a break to tell him how much she likes him, and he says he is impressed with her and how she is sexy and takes charge.  No way is he marrying her, though.  She’s not enough of a challenge for Nick.

The southern belle, Raven, tells Nick that she’s been cheated on before, and tells Nick that she’s previously been attracted to ass$ %@s, apparently unlike him. Corinne interrupts shark costume girl for her second time talking to Nick this evening, which she really Shouldn’t Do, according to Bachelor Etiquette.  Next, the mental health counselor discusses how the majority of her work “comes down to vulnerability,” but then she, too, is interrupted by Corinne, who is now taking her third turn with Nick, which is really an unprecedented breach of protocol.  Weirdly, Nick keeps letting her do this, meaning either the producers told him not to stop her, or he’s really a boob guy, to the exclusion of being a personality guy.

Uh oh!  The mental health counselor steals Nick back! Later, Corinne, who is fairly inebriated, says that the mental health counselor, whose name I should really learn at some point, “re-interrupted” her and that is out of line.  This is the definition of “the inability to understand others’ perspectives.” She then gives a drunken rant telling the other girls that nobody should be there to make friends, but should be there for Nick only, and so forth.  Nick, bizarrely, gives Corinne the rose, who then says that her dad would be proud of her performance this evening, “even though I was naked.” The other women respond with silence, and Corinne says “I was just Corinne, that’s all I did, guys.”  Which appears to be their issue.

Back at the house, Corinne tells another girl how she’s not used to guys listening to her, which is why she’s so into Nick.  The helicopter comes to take Danielle, the neonatal nurse, on a one-on-one date.  The other women are excited for her, or at least putting on a good impression of being excited for her. Nick and Danielle’s helicopter lands on a yacht in Newport Beach, which is like my last date, except for the yacht, helicopter, and location. It turns out that Nick and Danielle are from the same hometown, and she will be the madonna character in the madonna-whore trope that underlies the show.  Three guesses who’s the whore.

Back at the house, Liz the doula tells another girl, Christen, that she had sex with Nick.  She asks how much time we have left to the show, and I answer, 39 minutes.  Oh wait, I was just dissociating during this awkward conversation.  Christen, like all of America, appears confused as to why Liz refused to give Nick her number after the hookup but yet wants to be on the show now.

Meanwhile, on the yacht, Nick and Danielle canoodle in a cute and laid back way, but, with her low hypnotic voice and natural makeup, I think she’s too low-drama for Nick. She seems like someone that wouldn’t be terribly good in bed, unless you’re into necrophilia. Oh wait, the corpse is perking up, and that joke was in terribly poor taste, since she now is confiding that she had a dead drug addicted fiance.  He wasn’t dead at the time of engagement though.  We think. Danielle gets the rose, as does anyone who ever discusses a death during a one-on-one.  He tells the camera that he connected with Danielle in a deeper way than he thought he would, and she’s cute and lovable and then they get on a Ferris Wheel and kiss and life is a dream when you’re young, hot, and on reality TV. Back in my life, my dog just scooted on the carpet so she probably needs her anal glands expressed.

Another date card arrives at the house and Liz is upset that that she only merits a group date invite, and not a one-on-one. Te group date is at some weird museum of things that people leave behind from failed relationships, which includes the ring that Nick used to propose to Caitlin during his failed proposal on The Bachelorette. There is a staged fight where a couple breaks up, and the stupider girls think it’s real and not staged.  Then, the girls are supposed to fake break up with Nick in front of a live audience, because they have literally thought of every other date option already on this show.

Liz freaks out because she thinks that Nick is avoiding her, because drama queen.  Now we move to the breakups, which are actually kind of funny, but I think my bar for humor on this show is low. Liz the drama queen tries to make this into a real conversation.  She talks about their hookup at Jade and whoever’s wedding and says that he didn’t fight for her, in this fake conversation that is actually real.  He is very weirded out and tells the camera that he didn’t expect Liz to share their “dating” story in front of the other women.

Group date. Nick talks to the women, trying to suss out whether they know that he’s hooked up with Liz. Christen confirmed that Liz told her that They Had Sex. He confirms this as well, and Christen thanks him for his honesty, which is apparently a thing that is done on this show a minimum of three times per episode.

Nick corners Liz and tells her that he knows that she told Christen that They Had Sex.  He says that he hasn’t heard from her before this, but now she’s on the show, so if she wanted to pursue a relationship, why did she wait till she was going to be on TV to do it? She says various contradictory and confusing things that do nothing to assuage Nick’s fears that she’s a fame whore. Then he dumps her, which teaches you a lesson, ladies: if you like a dude, call him after sex, don’t wait till he’s on national TV to pursue him.  Generalize to your own life situation as needed.

Nick goes back and tells the women that he Had Sex with Liz but now dumped her, and the “To Be Continued” sign comes across the screen.  Next time, we see women crying because of the idea of Nick Having Sex with anyone but them.  And the Bachelorette contestants and the people on Bachelor in Paradise, but whatever.  And till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Says, You’re a Shoo In For Bachelor in Paradise, Liz.

 

This post was originally published here on Dr. Psych Mom. Follow Dr. Rodman on Dr. Psych Mom, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest.

Order 52 Emails to Transform Your Marriage and How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family.

Learn about Dr. Rodman’s private practice, including therapy, coaching, and consultation, here. This blog is not intended as diagnosis, assessment, or treatment, and should not replace consultation with your medical provider.

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Dragon Ball Super Episode 72 Review

Warning: Full spoilers for the episode below.

Apologies for the delay of this review due to the holiday!

Fighting is at the core of “Will There Be A Counterattack?! The Invisible Killing Strike!”, as Hit returns to finish what he started with Goku. Good fight scenes help prop up Episode 72, but it’s ultimately weighed down by some strange story decisions and an all too convenient revival of our hero.

The highlight of this episode is once again Hit. The assassin continues to impress as he returns to fight Goku and finish him off once and for all. His minimalist fighting style and cold attitude counter Goku well, and his unique powers force Goku to think outside the box rather than relying on brute force to solve the problem. His animation is also quite different, which helps lend to the air of mystery that surrounds his character. The ending of the episode leaves things open for future appearances, so we hope to see his character built upon as the series progresses.

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What Vader Was Up to Between Episode III and Rogue One

With Darth Vader back onscreen in Rogue One, we catch you up on what he was doing in the time since Revenge of the Sith’s ending.
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This Is Us Cast Breaks Down Those Christmas Episode Shockers, From Relationship Reveals to the Health Crisis

This Is UsThis is us still crying over the This Is Us Christmas episode. Oh boy. The fall finale–This Is Us goes on hiatus until Tuesday, Jan. 10 at 9 p.m. on NBC–featured a bevy of happenings, from…

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Civil Rivalry: Episode 5 of the Time Card Series

Civil Rivalry: Episode 5 of the Time Card Series


The Time Card series follows the adventures and fortunes of three friends – Blue, Jesse, and Ellie – as they use the contents of their newly found case to travel to diverse and exotic places. Their middle school studies come alive as they interact with historical figures of their country and the world, while at the same time struggling to not change the timeline or upset the course of history. Trying to hide the case from present day bullies, the friends try to stay one step ahead of their arch enemies Ryan Johnson and Jake Barker, not to mention sinister otherworld forces that are determined to find the time card. In the final episode of the first series, Jake Barker and Ryan Johnson steal the time card, and the three friends must hurry to find it (and the bullies) before history is changed. The Daktars threaten again, and Commander Tam Harnik hones in on the kids and the time card. Join the kids as they explore new worlds, battle bullies, deal with family issues, and ultimately try to save the world. Each episode of The Time Card is aimed at young readers as short stories that can be read in a single sitting. As English teachers, we are always on the lookout for stories that our students (middle/high school) are interested in reading. We’ve found that most young readers (heck, ‘en many adults!) who are reluctant to read balk at long stories. We really wanted to offer them short, engaging fiction stories, so we created The Time Card series. Anyone will enjoy the stories while learning about history, dealing with social situations, and improving vocabulary and reading skills. We hope you and your children enjoy these stories as much as we are enjoying writing them!

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Virtual Reality Porn Could Turn Our Sex Lives into an Episode of Black Mirror

And that might be a good thing.

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The Real Housewives of Orange County: Season 8 Episode 3 – Making Up Is Hard To Do

The Real Housewives of Orange County: Season 8 Episode 3 – Making Up Is Hard To Do


Vicki invites Alexis to be the first to meet her new grandson, Troy. Meanwhile, Tamra and Gretchen shop for baby gifts, and as Tamra tries to get her relationship with Vicki back on track, Vicki threatens to derail their progress. Heather meets with Lydia McLaughlin about featuring her house in Lydia’s magazine, but Heather won’t give up the goods without a promise of the cover.
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Game of Thrones: Episode Five “A Nest of Vipers” Season Finale Trailer

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A few select moments from the available choices lead up to the season finale of Telltale’s Game of Thrones.
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‘South Park’ To Take On Police Violence In New Episode

The national debate on police violence has spread from Ferguson and Baltimore all the way to the small town of South Park, Colorado.

On this Wednesday’s episode of long-running animated series “South Park,” the town’s residents decide to abolish the police because they’re fed up with people who “impose their authority on the underprivileged.” Given the Comedy Central show’s history of iconoclasm, and its focus in Season 19 on political correctness, we’re gonna go ahead and guess that it doesn’t end well. 

Here’s a clip from the episode, in which one of the town’s police officers defends his kind, saying that “not all cops are racist, trigger-happy assholes.” 

“South Park,” which was created by college friends Trey Stone and Matt Parker, has a long and storied history of tackling controversial topics. Many of its most inflammatory episodes have focused on religious figures like Muhammad to the Virgin Mary. 

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Andrew Lincoln Dropped His Script Over Crazy Upcoming ‘Walking Dead’ Episode

Look at the flowers, “Walking Dead” fans. Season 6 is going to blow your minds.

(Warning! Spoilers!)

The Season 6 premiere of “The Walking Dead” aired Sunday, and wow. After discovering an army of walkers trapped not far from Alexandria, Rick convinced everyone to follow his pretty insane idea to lead all the walkers away at once. Then, just when you think they’re finally in the clear, a mysterious horn sounded from the direction of Alexandria, leading all the walkers directly there. 

Holy crud. And it’s about to get even more nuts. 

The Huffington Post caught up with star Andrew Lincoln at the “Walking Dead” fan premiere. He said the show eclipses its zombie count from all of last season in the first three episodes of Season 6, and ”every single episode is like a season finale.”

“The fallout in those last 30 seconds sort of propels the story arc for the next maybe eight episodes, and get ready — because two and three are like body blows and then four spins out into this indie arthouse movie — then five, six, seven, eight – I think nine is the most crazy episode we’ve had. I dropped my script when I read it. I was just like, ‘Nooo! We’re doing that?'” said Lincoln. ”So yeah, it’s crazy. It’s amazing storytelling. I think [showrunner] Scott Gimple and the team have just outdone themselves this season.”

Yep. Time to get excited. And crazy episodes aren’t the only thing coming. Rick Grimes also told us a fallen friend is making a return to the show. 

“The beard is definitely coming back. I was campaigning for it,” said Lincoln.

Hallelujah! It’s back! Rick Grimes‘ heavenly beard is back! Fear the beard, walkers. 

Fear. The. Beard.

Image: AMC/Celebitchy

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Just Cause 3 Developer Diary – Episode 2: Destruction

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Our full playthrough of Until Dawn sent us in a spiral of violence against the animal kingdom.
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Tales from the Borderlands Episode 4: Escape Plan Bravo Trailer

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The mission blasts off in the second-to-last episode of Telltale’s romp into the Borderlands.
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Tales from the Borderlands Episode Three Launch Trailer

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The third installment “Catch A Ride” expands the Telltale adventures series Tales from the Borderlands.
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The Bachelorette Episode 7 Recap: Ian Go Bragh

The guys on The Bachelorette are starting to crack like Chris Harrison's hair gel after a 14-hour shoot. The guy with the "six-year-old who found scissors and 400 Pixi Stix" haircut cried. Shawn B. go…




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Just Played Life is Strange: Episode 3

Just Played - Life is Strange Episode 3 - Thumb

*Spoiler Warning* An incredible plot twist sends Huber and Elyse reeling; has Max gone too far?
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The Bachelorette Episode 2 Recap: Questionable Moves

Last night's episode had all the makings of a perfect Bachelorette: a talented and hilarious skeptic (Amy Schumer), a cliffhanger ending, and the afternoon of bloodsport Chris Harrison demanded in his contract negotiations last year….




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Ladies in the Lobby Episode 3: Xbox vs. PS4: Fighting the Good Fight?

Ladies in the Lobby - Episode 3 Xbox vs PS4 - Thumb

Microsoft, Sony and Nintendo all bring something different to the table, so why do we feel the need to pick sides? How much do exclusives, hardware and fan allegiance truly matter?
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Game of Thrones: Episode Four “Sons of Winter” Sons of Winter Debut Trailer

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The next chapter is coming, as Telltale’s six-part series based in Game of Thrones.
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‘The Bachelorette’ Season 11 Episode 2 Recap: Kaitlyn Bristowe Wins — And Gives Roses To A Few Losers

It’s 2015. By now, reality TV is a young adult, but it hasn’t grown out of “The Bachelor” franchise. Despite its bizarre dating rituals, low success rate, and questionable racial and gender politics, the stable of shows is, if anything, more popular than ever. Do people love “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette,” or do they love to hate it? It’s unclear. But here at Here To Make Friends, we both love and love to hate them — and we love to snarkily dissect each episode in vivid detail.

In this week’s second Here To Make Friends podcast (it is a two-part premiere … thanks, ABC), hosts Claire Fallon, HuffPost culture writer, and Emma Gray, senior editor of HuffPost Women, recap the May 19 episode of “The Bachelorette,” Season 11. We’ll break down the conclusion of the two-Bachelorette thing, Kaitlyn’s taste in men and the slut-shamey, sex talk season highlights. (Also… the return of Nick Viall?!)

You can check out our past and future episodes of Here To Make Friends and other HuffPost Podcasts on The Huffington Post’s Sound Cloud page. Thanks to our producer, Katelyn Bogucki and our editor Jorge Corona.

Also, check out the HuffPost Here To Make Friends podcast on iTunes and make sure to rate and review the show, too.

The best tweets about this week’s second “Bachelorette”…

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Style – The Huffington Post
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Nina Dobrev Shares Throwback Photos Before Her Final Episode Of ‘Vampire Diaries’

Nina Dobrev is understandably getting a little sentimental. After all, it can’t be easy to say goodbye to the character she’s played for the past six seasons on “The Vampire Diaries,” as well as the show’s cast and crew.

In honor of the Season 6 finale, which will be the 26-year-old actress’ last episode, Dobrev has been taking a walk down memory lane and posting #throwbackthursday photos, every hour on the hour, to count down to tonight’s episode.

“It’s been 6 amazing years… there have been a million great memories. Thank you to everyone who has joined me on this incredible journey. I love you all…. ❤️Love, Nina. Aka Elena,” she captioned the first throwback photo she posted.

#TVDTBT @katgrahampics @steven_r_mcqueen @saradjcanning @iansomerhalder @candiceaccola @questionanders

A photo posted by Nina Dobrev (@ninadobrev) on

“The Vampire Diaries” airs Thursdays at 8 p.m. on The CW.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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Just Played Final Fantasy XV: Episode Duscae

Just Played - Final Fantasy XV Episode Duscae - Thumb

We dig deep into the Final Fantasy XV demo and discuss how this monumental JRPG is shaping up.
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5 Perfect Quotes From HBO’s ‘Girls’ Season 4, Episode 7

Here at HuffPost Women, one of the things we love most about Lena Dunham’s HBO show, “Girls,” is the incisive, witty and hilarious dialogue that Dunham and the rest of her writing team come up with every week. So instead of simply recapping Season 4, we decided to pick five quotable gems from each episode.

Episode 7: “Ask Me My Name”

At the start of this episode, Hannah starts a new career as a substitute teacher, drawing connections between the Oedipus Complex to the “MILF” in an inventive, albeit inappropriate, pedagogical style. A strapping fellow educator, Fran (Played by Jake Lacy, who we recognized for his role in “Obvious Child”), invites Hannah to drinks, which she accepts in her first inaugural post-Adam date.

Hannah interrupts a great first date to drag an oblivious Fran to Mimi-Rose’s art show, where Marni and Desi also happen to be. As is Adam, who confronts Hannah about the ambush. Turning the tables, Hannah claims his instant recognition of her “in a crowd of 40-70 people” is proof he’s not over her. All in front of Fran. Poor Fran.

Without Fran, Hannah follows the art coterie to the after-party. Mimi-Rose insists she and Hannah ride together, while Adam is stuck with Mimi-Rose’s former partner Adam (Zachary Quinto) who declares his intention to get MRH back. A series of “only in New York” events — a tumbled octogenarian there, a bodega robbery there — allow an odd, yet touching kinship between Hannah and her ex-boyfriend’s new girlfriend. Mimi Rose even offers to give Adam back to Hannah through a fun little creative project. Hannah, naturally, rejects the idea. Still, by the episode’s end, Mimi-Rosie has fully endeared herself to Hannah through multiple laundromat soliloquies. In the most tender moment between the two since last season, Hannah is moved to tell Adam that “she gets it.”

adamfrandate

Hannah on why she masturbates before going out on a date: “That’s what you do before a date. so the sexual tension doesn’t overwhelm the evening, so you can think.”

Elijah consulting on Hannah’s outfit choice: “I mean if you want him to think you killed your kids and have been living in the Florida panhandle, knock yourself out.”

Fran on his occasional quid pro quo teaching style: “Joe and I have an arrangement. He brings me a juice box, and I don’t fail his older sister.”

Mimi-Rose explaining the synopsis for her book: “It’s a psychosexual thriller told from the perspective of a dead woman who solves her own murder using this hologram technology she invented.”

Jessa on her romantic future with Ace: “I’ll be pregnant with his twins by May.”
Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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The Bachelor Episode 7 Recap: I Heart Arlington

It's only Tuesday, but we've lived a century in Bachelor time this week. Chris Harrison sat patiently, eyes sparkling with well-honed professional compassion, as former Bachelorette Andi Dorfman somehow kept a snot drip at bay…




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The Scandal Cast Says Next Week’s Episode “Will Break Twitter, No Ifs, Ands, or Buts”

Getting the cast of Scandal to admit anything about upcoming episodes is as likely as a Friends reunion: slim to none. But once in a while, you'll find an actor having a weak moment and…




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5 Perfect Quotes From HBO’s ‘Girls’ Season 4, Episode 2

Here at HuffPost Women, one of the things we love most about Lena Dunham’s HBO show, “Girls,” is the incisive, witty and hilarious dialogue that Dunham and the rest of her writing team come up with every week. So instead of simply recapping Season 4, we decided to pick five quotable gems from each episode.

Episode 1: “Triggering”

Hannah’s arrival in Iowa is the focus of this episode. The landing is smooth: Hannah scores a house to live in for $ 250 a month and a snazzy new bike that she doesn’t have to lock because “this is Iowa.” A video chat with Marnie reveals that Hannah and Adam don’t seem to be on speaking terms, but Marnie promises to let her know if he goes into the hospital, (because Marnie would definitely be the first on he’d call?). Cracks in Hannah’s midwestern paradise soon begin to show. She is forced to escape her suburban fortress when the prior tenant, which happens to be a very aggressive bird, shows up angry. She gets locked out but climbs in through an unlocked window because, you know, this is Iowa. But Hannah’s here to write, and what better place to find self affirmation than a graduate level fiction course? Many other places, as Hannah learns. She shares an excerpt detailing an interesting, “50-shades” type sexual encounter, and she is offended by her classmate’s critique. She invents some friends — Shannon, Jeff, Jonesly, Ranchini, Nagasaki and Cher — and wallows until a surprise visit from Elijah. The two hit the town hard. Hannah counsels weepy undergraduates and Elijah offers massages. They wake up the next morning covered in dried blue paint, because, you know, this is Iowa.

elijahhhannahparty

Hannah protesting the concept of “TMI”: “By the way, TMI is such an outdated concept. There’s no such thing as too much information, this is the information age!”

Elijah on his friendly reception. “On the way to the airport, two people asked me if I was Blake Lively’s husband. Iowa is amazing!”

Classmates on whether Hannah’s “fiction” might be autobiographical: “I mean, the main character is a girl with a lot of tattoos named Anna who needs to eat every two hours or she passes out.”

Marnie offering Hannah support the way only a BFF can: “No one is moving to Iowa ever, but I’m so, so glad you’re happy.”

Hannah on why her story excludes the male perspective: “One word: history.”
Comedy – The Huffington Post
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The Good Wife Is a Totally New Show As of Last Night’s Episode

You know who wastes zero time getting down to “new year, new you” revamping? The Good Wife. While most of TV is still sleeping off its holiday hangover, Alicia Florrick and Co. set up a…




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Breaking Down the Finale Episode of “Serial”: Do We Finally Know Who Did It?

After 11 captivating episodes digging in to the 1999 murder of Baltimore teenager Hae Min Lee and the man accused of the crime, her ex-boyfriend Adnan Syed, we've finally come to the last episode of…




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We Have A LOT of Questions After Episode 2 of The Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce!

And we’re back for week two of Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce! I love how this week we really got to learn more about the characters and what makes them tick. Last week, we watched best-selling…




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Star Wars: Episode VII – The Force Awakens Official Teaser Trailer #1 (2015) – J.J. Abrams Movie HD

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Star Wars: Episode VII – The Force Awakens Official Teaser Trailer #1 (2015) – J.J. Abrams Movie HD

A continuation of the saga created by George Lucas set thirty years after Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi (1983).

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Behind the Scenes at Parenthood’s 100th Episode Celebration

I don't want to make you cry more than you already do each Thursday, but we're down to the last six episodes of Parenthood. (I'll pause to let you grab the tissues.) That isn't lost…




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Behind the Scenes at Parenthood’s 100th Episode Celebration

I don't want to make you cry more than you already do each Thursday, but we're down to the last six episodes of Parenthood. (I'll pause to let you grab the tissues.) That isn't lost…




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‘The League,’ Season 6, Episode 11 Recap: EBDBBnB

Andre and Russell’s wine bar, Menage a Cinq, is officially open for business and as such, the two have embarked on the best marketing campaign they could think of: vlogs! We’re fortunate enough to get a glimpse of episode #34 and it DOES NOT disappoint. There are excessively long hashtags, crude sexual references, and a boatload of awkwardness. Not going to lie, this is a wine bar I’d visit.

bethesda

Ruxin actually makes an appearance in this week’s episode (Is it annoyingly noticeable to anyone else when he’s not around? Anyone? Bueller?). He’s awfully irritated by an unknown coworker who apparently decided it was a great idea to brush their teeth in the company bathroom and then leave said toothbrush on the toilet paper dispenser. I totally agree with Ruxin in regards to how freaking weird this is… that’s totally unsanitary. The next day, the toothbrush is gone but the remnants left over still irritate Ruxin when he enters the bathroom to pee again. This time around, even more weirdness ensues — not involving the toothbrush — when his coworker Chaps enters the bathroom and begins taking a crap right next to Ruxin. Absolutely disgusted, Ruxin leaves in a huff and goes to Bethesda’s office to complain. Again, agreed with Ruxin. Peeing in front of someone is one thing, but doing the number two? COME ON. Have you NO shame?? Anyway, Bethesda thinks nothing of the crapping adjacency and scolds Ruxin for not working on his deposition. Typical.

After a trip to the doctor, Pete thinks he may have a gluten allergy and Kevin and Taco are quick to point out that now he and Andre are matching! Because Andre is a huge creep and takes any excuse to bond waaaaaay too far, Pete attempts to keep the gluten allergy thing under wraps. All seems to be going fine until Andre brings his decanters over to the MacArthur household because he needs help deciding which one would be best for the Menage a Cinq centerpieces. Amidst a slew of sexual jokes involving the decanters looking like butt plugs, Pete sneaks away to the kitchen to replenish his gluten free beer undetected. Unfortunately, Andre catches him and insists they become “GFFs.” As the prospective bonding seems to be taking full effect — solely on Andre’s part — Kevin intervenes and says that the gluten free beer is his father-in-law’s, not Pete’s.

Taco has put some of his EBDb money to good use and finally bought a house in the “slumburbs,” courtesy of Jenny and her realty skills. However, he’s bought the house for a much different purpose than initially intended. Touted the “EBDBBNB,” Taco turns the house into a bed-and-breakfast for his eskimo brothers (and others) and essentially makes it a brothel, though he vehemently denies that it is one. In an AMAZING musical video, Taco shows off his new bed-and-breakfast and the gang watches in awe. Taco encourages his friends to join him over the weekend and watch the game at the EBDBBNB’s opening. This upsets Andre, who’s already asked everyone to come to Menage a Cinq. Let the games begin — literally and figuratively.

menage a cinq

Determined to catch Chaps as the “toothbrush bandit,” Ruxin follows Chaps into the bathroom and catches him redhanded… with an insulin pen. The failed bust leads to another meeting in Bethesda’s office with both Ruxin and Chaps. Ruxin’s forced to eat a big ol’ bowl of crow when, yet again, no one seems to think it’s weird that there is no divider between the toilet and the urinal so he has to apologize to Chaps for his behavior/accusations. I stand by my earlier statements. It’s still gross.

Kevin catches Jenny attempting to do laundry and thwarts her efforts to wash his lucky jersey, which he removes from the basket and immediately puts on. In the same minute, Taco walks in the house and starts moving boxes because he’s moving all his stuff out of the MacArthur’s house. You can almost see the internal dancing happening in Kevin and Jenny’s minds. Praise the lucky jersey.

Still not pleased with Taco’s takeover of game day on Sunday, Andre confronts him. In doing so, Andre runs into Marshawn Lynch, a new friend of Taco and apparent big fan of the EBDBBNB. Andre attempts to bond with Lynch and it fails miserably. Lynch leaves in his Mercedes, but not before telling Taco he’ll “holla” at him. Taco and Andre agree to split the day and Andre is pleased.

The gang heads over to Menage a Cinq and Andre attempts to put them all in a bread coma. Pete, who’s not supposed to eat gluten, gets pressured into eating an entire bowl of bread pudding and proceeds to vomit all over Kevin. His good luck jersey is clearly not lucky because outside of the vomit, Kevin also loses the game and ends up not making it to the playoffs. It’s off to the Sacko for him. As game day continues at the EBDBBNB, Sofia makes her “world famous chorizo” for the gang. Unfortunately, she ends up unintentionally using Taco’s lambskin condoms as the chorizo casing (NOTE: How the hell this could EVER happen, I will never know but… disbelief will suspended regardless). Once the gang realizes the mistake, they predictably spit out the condom chorizo. FOREVER UNCLEAN.

pete and andre

At Ruxin’s office the next day, he’s still trying to brush the condom chorizo out of his mouth, to no avail. Mid-brush, Ruxin gets the urge to poop and he makes moves for the toilet. As he begins, Bethesda catches him and calls him a hypocrite for brushing and pooping when he’s been complaining about someone else doing the same thing for days. Moments later, Bethesda pulls out his toothbrush as he pees, indicating he’s the real “toothbrush bandit.” Ruxin’s stomach gurgles and as he poops, he and Bethesda yell “AHHHHHH” in unison while maintaining eye contact. The whole encounter makes me wildly uncomfortable. Alas, another glorious episode of inappropriateness is over. Until next week, dear friends…

THINGS TO NOTE:

  • Andre’s hashtag shirt.
  • “Stop with the gluten shit, Yeast Mode.”
  • Banana Bottom Boys.
  • “I want to hold hands with you and walk into bakeries and tell everyone that what they’re putting into their bodies is poison.”
  • Grain brains.
  • “Andre, move your butt plugs out of the way.”
  • “And if you’re not having sex, put the DISTURB sign on the door and someone will be right in to fix that for you.”
  • “Ice and lube in 302 please!”
  • “Jenny, you’re the oldest lesbian I know.”
  • Condom chorizo.
  • Keep up with “The League” recaps here every week. “The League” airs on Wednesdays at 10 p.m. ET on FXX.
    Comedy – The Huffington Post
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    Doctor Who Season 8, Episode 11: Dark Water

    SPOILER ALERT: Don’t read ahead if you haven’t watched Doctor Who series 8, episode 11: Dark Water

    With all the shade I’ve thrown at Steven Moffat during his reign as the Doctor Who show runner, one thing I can’t hate on is how well he knows and trolls the fandom. Last week Tumblr was buzzing with a phenomenal theory that Missy was a dark iteration of Clara merged with The Great Intelligence resurfacing from the Doctor’s Timeline. It seemed like all the loose ends since the introduction of Clara Oswald as the new companion would get tied up in a pretty bow. It would explain who gave Clara The Doctor’s number, who placed the ad in the paper and maybe even answer my favorite mystery of why River was able to maintain a psychic link with Clara after the latter jumped into The Doctor’s timeline. Moffat very skillfully reinforced those speculations in the preview for ‘Dark Water,’ cutting together scenes that made Clara and The Doctor seem at odds. It was a similar strategy that we saw for ‘Mummy On The Orient Express,’ as Clara was completely left out of the trailer, launching the fandom into a frenzy over her departure from The Doctor.

    I had the same reaction to the revelation of Missy’s identity as I’ve had to most other Moffat mysteries, shocked and not surprised all at the same time. But before diving into the big reveal, we have talk about the true lifeline of this season, Clara’s relationship with The Doctor.

    ‘Dark Water’ made me seriously fall in love with Clara’s dynamic with Capaldi’s Doctor. For much of Jenna Coleman’s initial tenure as the companion, I had a hard time buying into her disposition toward The Doctor. However with so much of this season focused pretty much entirely on Clara as a three dimensional character, the emotional narrative arc feels like it is coming to a logical conclusion. In the past my biggest issue with Moffat’s treatment of Clara has been the lack of reasoning behind her actions, but this season everything she’s done makes perfect sense.

    After a tragic phone call with Danny, Clara attempts to black mail The Doctor into rewriting history. She is so distressed by her loss that she completely betrays The Doctor. This is a defining moment in their relationship and specifically for the new Doctor. We see him being completely empathetic towards a friend, despite an entire season of being an old grouch. There is nuance to his personality, it makes him relatable and a hero an audience can identify with.

    Overall, Capaldi was magnificent in this episode. It took me a long time to warm up to his portrayal, especially as a lot of the lines he was given in the beginning of the season were simply annoying. In ‘Dark Water’ he finally struck the right comedic balance that didn’t feel forced. In most of the episodes we’d seen so far he seemed like a formulaic one trick pony per episode, either constantly rude, or constantly “dark” and mysterious, or constantly goofy. The writing in ‘Dark Water’ highlighted the best assets of Capaldi especially his comedic timing.

    The character narrative on the show is at its highest, however the same can’t be said for the plot. As we finally found out that Missy is a regenerated Master. The last we saw of The Master, he was bent on revenge against Rassilon following him into the time locked Time War. This may mean that we’re about to finally revisit the fate of Gallifrey narrative, but judging by the reveals this week, I’m hesitant to bet on any one theory. As reveals go, it was almost painfully obvious, but I will reserve my last judgment until the finale.

    The presence of cyberman is a little confusing, but The Master does have a history with robotic humanoids (Toclafane anyone?). I’m not really sure how the cyberman will be taking over the dead in order to take over the earth, but I guess we shall see.

    It seems that the real battle will be unfolding closer to home for Clara and The Doctor. We saw Danny manipulate Clara into shutting off their connection in order to keep her form ending up in The Nethersphere, but my guess is that she will soon see through that. The most interesting cliffhanger of this episode is Danny’s fate. There’s an obvious question of why Clara was calling Danny while he was struck by a car, which ties into the story of Danny’s grandson Orson Pink. In ‘Listen’ Orson clearly implied that he and Clara were connected, leading fans to conclude that Danny and Clara would end up together… or at least have kids together. Now whether Danny will be alive to see his kids grow up is what remains to be seen next week.

    Finally for those of us still holding out for the return of River Song… I’m gonna leave this right here.
    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    ‘The League,’ Season 6, Episode 7 Recap: The Heavenly Fouler

    Kicking off this episode in front of the TV, the gang is at Andre’s chatting about Ellie attending Sunday school. Kevin says it’s because they want her to have some semblance of morals and Jenny just keeps it real by saying that she can watch the game without interruptions now. Quality parenting, FTW. Taco interrupts the convo with MAJOR TacoCorp news: someone has stolen his walkman with a recording of all the EBDb information on it. GREAT ODIN’S RAVEN.

    Andre rescues a cat, which he calls “Milady.” The kitty causes everyone to bite their tongues at the plethora of pussy jokes suddenly waiting to be thrown out there. I don’t even feel bad for Andre anymore. Homeboy does it to himself. Jenny takes the possibility of pussy wordplay to the next level by proposing that the first person to crack under the hilarity and make a pussy play has to trade their best running back. Let the games begin.

    Because apparently the McArthur’s are always having health issues, Jenny’s the one visiting her doctor this time around. She’s a little backed up in the bowels and as such, the doc gives her a “stool kit.” For three days, Jenny’s got to take samples of her poop and scoop them up, put them in baggies, and freeze ’em. Gives new meaning to the word “fudgsicle.” Yeah.. you already know where this is going.

    At Gibson’s, as always, Pete’s debuting a new chick named Penny, played by Anna Camp. Penny runs a pet grooming company that specializes in “cattitude,” which is a great bonding point with Andre. After she leaves, Andre tells the guys of an upcoming photo shoot he has with Milady. Pete, Kevin, and Taco are literally squirming as they skirt around the massive pussy… I mean, elephant… in the room. Andre asks Kevin if he can do the shoot at his house because Kevin has the play set and Kevin happily agrees. Kevin also convinces Pete to get Penny to give Milady some extra “cattitude.” Pete obliges and Penny is super excited at the prospect of getting to groom Andre’s cat for the shoot. Andre has promised to refer her to all of his wealthy, doctor friends if all goes well. Unaware that the whole thing is a prank, Penny shares her excitement with Pete and, in a shocking twist, we see Pete visualize some discomfort at being a dick. GASP.

    pete kevin and taco

    Reverting back to Jenny and her situation for a hot second, she is extremely disgusted by having to freeze her excrement. That disgust, however, pales in comparison to her disgust for Ellie’s claims that she and Kevin are worshipping false idols. As per her new Sunday school teachings, Ellie is regarding Jenny and Kevin’s affection for the Shiva as something that will send them to Hell. I hate to be the bearer of bad news here, Ellie, but that ship has long since sailed for your proud parents. So take your Sunday school prayers and get out of Jenny’s face because the Shiva ain’t going nowhere.

    Anyway, Kevin and Taco persuade an unsure Pete to go through with the prank and Kevin heads to play basketball. While there, he runs into his priest. Kevin’s priest, played by the adorable Jerry O’Connell, whoops his ass on the court – literally. The “heavenly fouler,” as Andre so aptly calls him, even goes so far that he gives Kevin a black eye. I’d feel bad but Kevin has an extremely punchable face so the bruise fits.

    Ellie’s clearly taking notes from the mother of Carrie in this episode because homegirl is going full-fledged batshit and biblical. After reciting some Bible verses at, not to, her parents, Pete, and, Andre, she storms out of the room just before the whole gang recites some “Hail Shivas.” Taco interrupts the Shiva-ing to reveal the EBDb information that was on the walkman – one tidbit of which includes a lesbian encounter that Jenny had with a girl on her field hockey team back in the day. Kevin is not enthused about the secret keeping and runs to the kitchen to get ice for his priest-induced shiner. He grabs one of Jenny’s frozen poop bags to use and Jenny doesn’t have the heart to tell him that it’s not what he thinks it is.

    Kevin plays basketball with the priest again and the fouling continues. Irritated, Kevin fouls right back and slams the priest in the face. The priest pulls the “I’m a man of God!” card and clutches his temple. Kevin tries to make amends by offering the priest an ice pack. Shit hits the face, I mean, the fan… hell, I mean the face AND the fan, when the “ice pack” starts leaking actual crap on the priest’s face. What’d I say before? We knew something like this would happen. Oh Kevin.

    priest jerry oconnell

    Taco goes into a Chinese convenience store, intent on finding his lost walkman and in rustling around the various food items, the owner screams at him. The owner then chases Taco out of the store and to escape, Taco hops into the nearest dumpster. The dumpster happens to have the walkman in it, EBDb information and all, and all is right with the world according to Taco.

    At the photo shoot for Andre, Penny arrives with Milady and the cat is straight-up rachet. Decked out in tattoos (including one of Andre’s face), a hat, and paw sleeves, Andre’s pussy is far from camera-ready. Andre is furious and vows to poorly review Penny on Yelp, Penny is distraught, and, yet again, another one of Pete’s flings comes to a crashing, burning halt. Kevin and Jenny’s priest shows up with Ellie in tow because Taco failed to pick her up, as he was in the dumpster. Priest Jerry O’Connell calls out Kevin and Jenny for worshipping a pagan idol called Shiva and, desperate to explain, the two take him into the garage to show him the trophy. There they find Taco bathing in an inflatable pool and they only infuriate the priest more. The icing on the cake comes when the priest opens the cabinet that the Shiva is supposed to be in only to get attacked by Milady who was lurking inside. The priest leaves angrily, condemning them all to hell, and Taco gets the last word of the day with a perfectly timed pussy joke.

    Hail to the Shiva.

    THINGS TO NOTE:

  • “We’re on the verge of a Mark Cuban missile crisis.”
  • “Yeah, with the hair all over the place, it makes her look way older.”
  • Feces fort.
  • Andre’s use of Yelp.
  • “Preach hard, play hard.”
  • “You’re all fornicators and sodomites!”
  • Hail Shivas.
  • Pete’s eskimo brother, Sisqo.
  • “Dumpster ding-dong? Best day ever!”
  • The League” airs on Wednesdays at 10 p.m. ET on FXX.
    Comedy – The Huffington Post
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    You Can Now Watch Every Episode Of ‘South Park’ On Hulu For Free

    Sure, it’s great to catch reruns of “South Park” on Comedy Central. But what if you could watch any of its 247 episodes whenever you want, for free?

    Now you can, thanks to the shows’ new partnership with Hulu. On Saturday, July 12 at the Television Critics Academy press tour, the streaming service announced that it will be the exclusive online home for “South Park” starting the same day. Up until the premiere of the show’s eighteenth season on September 24, every episode of the animated comedy will be available to watch for free. After Season 18 begins, there will still be some episodes available for free on both Hulu and the show’s official site, but only Hulu Plus subscribers will have access to the entire “South Park” library.

    The streaming service also announced that its original series “East Los High,” a teen drama with an all Latino cast, has been renewed for a third season.
    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    Smoke and Dust: Wrath & Righteousness: Episode Six

    Smoke and Dust: Wrath & Righteousness: Episode Six


    “It really grips you….I lost a lot of sleep reading it.” –Tim LaHaye, co-author of the LEFT BEHIND series CHAOS REIGNS “The freeway was a mass of stalled cars. Virtually nothing moved. Some of the people still waited in their vehicles, convinced the government was going to send someone out to save them—to pick them up and drive them home. Most of the drivers and passengers, however, had finally started walking, and the freeway was crowded with weary people moving along the unending line of cars.” As the scale of the EMP attack on America becomes clear, society begins to break down. Tens of millions of people are instantly homeless, stranded on freeways or in airports that have gone silent. There is no food, no water, no rule of law. Sam and Bono, U.S. Army Special Forces soldiers who made it back to the States just before the attack, are two of those wandering the streets, searching for their families. But with no means of communication and transportation options severely limited, they are getting nowhere fast. Meanwhile, halfway across the country, Sam’s family has come face to face with evil and is struggling to survive. Can Sam find them in time, or will this epic war claim its latest victim? Against the backdrop of torn-from-the-headlines Middle Eastern drama, the Wrath & Righteousness series is a fast-paced thriller that explores man’s role in the eternal battle between good and evil. Chris Stewart is the New York Times bestselling author of several books, including The Miracle of Freedom. He is a world-record-setting Air Force pilot (fastest nonstop flight around the world) and president and CEO of The Shipley Group, a nationally recognized consulting and training company. Wrath & Righteousness is a ten episode e-book series by New York Times bestselling author Chris Stewart. Each episode is approximately 50,000-60,000 words (roughly two-thirds the length of a normal full-length novel). This series was adapted from the previously published The Great and Terrib

    Price: $
    Sold by Kobo Inc.

    ‘Game Of Thrones’ Season 4 Episode 9 Recap: ‘The Watchers On The Wall’

    Welcome to “Game of Moans,” the weekly recap of “Game of Thrones” Season 4 that highlights all the moan-worthy, gasp-filled, OMG moments that litter the Seven Kingdoms. In other words, you can get a traditional recap anywhere, so here’s all the sex, bloodshed, and WTF moments (the good stuff) that went down this week:

    (Spoiler alert for “GoT” Season 4, Episode 9 “The Watchers On the Wall.” Warning: Some images below show very graphic violence.)

    June 8’s “The Watchers On The Wall” served up 35 minutes of non-stop bloody, nerve-wracking action as the Wildlings arrived at Castle Black to fight the Night’s Watch. While Jon Snow can definitely kick some ass with his sword fighting skills, an unlikely hero emerged in this episode. Sam Tarly, previously the most naive and timorous character on the show, finally manned up by not only killing a Wilding, but by protecting his woman, getting his first kiss, and showing way more courage and wisdom than we ever could’ve expected. This was your night, Sam.

    The Watch-Out-For-The-Giant Moan
    The Wildlings didn’t just bring way more men than the Night’s Watch, they brought giants, and even giants sitting atop elephants! Giant Number One got really pissed off that his buddy Giant Number Two got killed. So he casually shot an arrow up towards the wall, hitting a guy and literally making him fly backwards off of the wall, landing on the ground below. Ouch.

    tv show gifs

    The Fuck-Yeah-Sam! Moan
    As I said above, it was a surprise to see Sam finally all grown up and matured. He gave his friend an honest pep talk, held him in his arms as he died and didn’t flee from battle, as he would’ve unquestionably done before. His best moment came when, instead of cowering under the Thenn charging at him, he loaded up his crossbow and — BAM! Samwell Tarly killed a live human, and it was a massive terrifying dude. (I literally clapped and cheered in this victorious moment.)

    tv show gifs

    The Ghost-Is-Gonna-Get-Ya Moan
    I almost forgot that Jon found Ghost at Craster’s and took him back to Castle Black. The poor pup has probably been pretty lonely and in need of some exercise now that he’s not being warged into by Bran. He definitely let out all that pent-up energy on a Wildling’s throat though.

    tv show gifs

    The Hammer Head Moan
    Jon showed some really impressive swordplay while fighting Styr, and I don’t know how he lasted as long as he did against the burly Thenn. Jon got his fair share of bruises (that face-smashing was pretty awful), but let’s not forget that Jon has Stark in his blood, and the Stark’s don’t go down easy. Finally, Jon grabbed a hammer and took out Stry (à la Ryan Gosling in “Drive”). And it was nasty.

    tv show gifs

    The Swinging Anchor Moan
    You gotta give it to the Night’s Watch, they came up with some pretty clever ways to take out the Wildlings. Suspending the two guys off the wall was a great trick, as well as the barrel launching. But the real secret weapon was tucked away in the ice. To stop the Wildlings from reaching the top of the Wall, they just casually thought, “Hey, why don’t we use that giant anchor we have hidden beneath the ice?”

    tv show gifs

    The Shot-Through-The-Heart Moan
    Love may bring an end to your duty, but it could also bring an end of your life. Poor Ygritte has thought about killing Jon for so long that when the moment finally came, her emotions overwhelmed her. You can’t blame her though, for wanting to kill him and not being able to. At least they had a few moments together as Jon held her in his arms as she died. I was really hoping he’d at least mention the “L” word or something sweet, but I guess the point got across. RIP, girl, I will miss your ferocious badassery.

    tv show gifs

    Some thoughts:

    • If Jon Snow ever has a son, that sex talk is going to be super awkward.
    • SAM’S FIRST KISS!!!!
    • Where did all this newfound wisdom on life and death and courage come from Mr. Samwell Tarly? Sorry Jon, but you truly know nothing compared to your BFF.
    • That tracking shot of the battle on the ground was fantastic. (Trying to join the Epic TV Tracking Shots Club, guys?
    • Ygritte couldn’t have had better last words.
    • The writers and George R.R. Martin both said this episode was bigger and better than “Blackwater,” but I have to disagree. This was no doubt a fun, action-packed battle filled with both cringe and cheer-worthy moments, and as far as scale, it was definitely bigger. Yet it wasn’t as clever and thrilling, or as emotionally straining, as “Blackwater.” However, that may be because I’m not nearly as invested in Castle Black’s affairs or Jon Snow as I am in the King’s Landing crowd.
    • Wait, can we all stop and mourn the depressing fact that only one episode is left in Season 4? I really wish the writers had switched this episode with last week’s. It’s a cruel tease to take us away from all the King’s Landing drama for a whole week, and there is still so many stories we need to revisit. Can we please get a bonus episode?
    • By the way, I’m still not over Oberyn. Being away from King’s Landing for a week did not distract me. Nice try, Dan Weiss and David Benioff.

    “Game of Thrones” airs on Sundays at 9 p.m. EDT on HBO.
    Arts – The Huffington Post
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    ‘Game Of Thrones’ Season 4 Episode 8 Recap: ‘The Mountain And The Viper’

    Welcome to “Game of Moans,” the weekly recap of “Game of Thrones” Season 4 that highlights all the moan-worthy, gasp-filled, OMG moments that litter the Seven Kingdoms. In other words, you can get a traditional recap anywhere, so here’s all the sex, bloodshed, and WTF moments (the good stuff) that went down this week:

    (Spoiler alert for “GoT” Season 4, Episode 8 “The Mountain and The Viper.” Warning: Some images below show nudity and very graphic violence.)

    We had to wait two whole weeks for “Game of Thrones” to return, but it was definitely worth it. “The Mountain and The Viper” delivered one of the best duels the series has ever seen, and it was so horrific you probably weren’t be able to sleep afterwards.

    The Don’t-Mess-With-A-Wilding Moan

    Ygritte may be a woman, but she’s as fierce as any Wildling when the thirst for blood is high. That brothel girl sure learned that quickly when she got a spear through her chest. But just when you think Ygritte is a ruthless killer to the bone, a tad bit of motherly compassion spills through when she lets Gilly and little Sam Jr. live. Ygritte, or shall we call her the Westeros Black Mamba?

    tv show gifs

    The Sneak-A-Peek Moan
    Grey Worm may not have his stones and/or pillar, but that doesn’t mean a gorgeous naked woman doesn’t catch his eye. And hey dude, you’re not fooling anyone. Missandei knows exactly what you’re looking at. Try taking a tip out of Littlefinger’s creeper book.

    tv show gifs

    The Don’t-Trust-Anybody Moan

    The poor ironborn at Moat Cailin fell for Reek’s impression of Theon (and what a great performance that was, up until he nearly lost it). Ramsay trampled through and slaughtered everyone in his typical gruesome fashion.

    tv show gifs

    The GO-OBERYN! Moan

    Everyone except Cersei and Tywin was rooting for Oberyn in this tense duel. The Viper is certainly a skilled fighter (or shall I say dancer, since those moves looked more like ice dancing with a spear) as he dodged and ducked the Mountain for most of the fight. It was quiet a spectacle to watch and the moment Oberyn knocked down Gregor Clegane was one of the most victorious of the season.

    tv show gifs

    But then there was that moment, the moment we know all too well from movies and TV when the hero almost brings the villain to his death, but decides to boast for a minute. And then …

    The Oh-No-No-NO!!!! Moan

    … it was Oberyn’s downfall. A winning fighter can’t be an emotional fighter, and the Dorne charmer let his emotions get the best of him. Once The Mountain knocked him down it was clearly the end. But he didn’t just break the poor guy’s neck or slice his throat — he gave him the absolute grisliest, most horrific, most stomach-turning death we’ve ever seen on the series, and possibly all of TV (including the nightmare-inducing “Hannibal” deaths). Merely shoving Oberyn’s eyes into his head wasn’t enough — he had to squeeze his head until it literally exploded. Nasty. Horrifying. So, so depressing.

    tv show gifs

    Some thoughts:

    • Next time you play Guess That Tune, try tricking your friends with a Westeros song.
    • Finally Missandei is getting more lines and not just translating!
    • The only way to survive in these parts is to join the powerful, and Sansa has definitely learned a thing or two since Season 1. But damn girl, I did not see that change coming. *Slow clap*
    • … But then again, that got way creepy way fast between Littlefinger and Sansa. He’s giving such creepy pedophile vibes and her cleavage in that Maleficent-esque dress are not helping.
    • Hey Jorah, if you’re going to lie to and betray anyone, make sure it’s not the most powerful woman in the Seven Kingdoms, as well as the woman you love. She will kick you to the curb.
    • Ramsay Snow Bolton just got way too big of an ego boost.
    • WILL ARYA AND SANSA FINALLY MEET UP?! WHEN, WHEN, WHEN?
    • “Every Type Of Death Ever,” a new book from Tyrion Lannister featuring a new addition: “cousincide.”
    • Jaime was seriously enjoying the hell out of that fight. He looked like he was watching the damn Super Bowl. All he needed was a bowl of popcorn in that big metal hand.
    • Pedro Pascal, you will truly be missed.
    • Dear “GoT” directors and writers: Can you please, please stop torturing us with these traumatic ending shots of Tyrion’s fear-filled face? They are heartbreaking and I can’t take it anymore.

    “Game of Thrones” airs on Sundays at 9 p.m. EDT on HBO.
    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    ‘Game Of Thrones’ Season 4 Episode 6 Recap: ‘The Laws Of Gods And Men’

    Welcome to “Game of Moans,” the weekly recap of “Game of Thrones” Season 4 that highlights all the moan-worthy, gasp-filled, OMG moments that litter the Seven Kingdoms. In other words, you can get a traditional recap anywhere, so here’s all the sex, bloodshed, and WTF moments (the good stuff) that went down this week:

    (Spoiler alert for “Game of Thrones” Season 4, Episode 6 “The Laws of Gods and Men.”)

    As usual, Sunday night’s (May 11) episode, “The Laws of Gods and Men,” was fantastic, as well as heartbreaking. The two most tortured souls in “GoT,” Theon/Reek and Tyrion, had such emotional scenes this week, and both Alfie Allen and Peter Dinklage gave some of their best performances of the series.

    The Holy-Crap-This-Dude-Is-Crazy Moan
    Ramsay Snow is one of the most screwed up villiains “GoT” has ever seen and maybe even TV as a whole. He’s such a psycho it’s hard to not gasp in amazement and horror at his every evil move (or maybe I’m still in shock to see Iwan Rheon be so cruel after loving his “Misfits” character). Of course he exits his bedroom after ear-shattering sex covered in blood and scratches. Of course he smiles gleefully while hacking up men.

    The Dragon Attack Moan
    What a gorgeous, peaceful scene of a young boy watching his father’s goats grazing on hills of gently swaying grass. It was one of the most beautiful scenes of the season. But this is “Game of Thrones” guys, and beauty and peace are not things that last for long in the Seven Kingdoms. Up comes one of Dany’s dragons who proceeds to barbecue some grub just like it’s a hot July afternoon.

    The Oh-No-She-Didn’t Moan
    I was not expecting Shae to testify; nice little curve ball, Tywin. More importantly though, I don’t find her anger towards Tyrion completely justified. Yes, he broke her heart rather terribly, but we all know that he only acted that way out of love and to protect her. He never should’ve foolishly believed he could keep her safe in King’s Landing; that was his most selfish mistake. But to betray him like she did to the point of possibly causing his murder? That’s just too far, Shae.

    The Fuck-Yeah-Tyrion! Moan
    Good god, I love Tyrion. The last scene was absolutely incredible and as I said above, one of (if not the) best performances from Dinklage in the show yet. I was almost close to tears during the second half of the trial, mainly because I thought he was going to be killed (no, I don’t read the books), but also because I felt damn proud of him.

    Some thoughts:

    • That opening shot was fantastic. I’m not sure why, but the photography this episode was more stunning than usual.
    • LOL, pirate jokes.
    • Further on what I said above (because it just can’t be expressed enough), Ramsay is so horribly horribly evil. Now that Theon has completely morphed into Reek, he wants Reek to pretend to be Theon?! Can Theon/Reek do it? If he acts like Theon could the familiarity of it remind him of who he really is? This will be really interesting …
    • Damn, Daenerys has the most titles of anyone in this show. You think they’d use some abbreviations for her long introduction, especially when she has over 200 meet and greets.
    • So it’s official, Varys is a asexual. (Not surprising.)
    • Jaime is just getting more and more valiant. He’s proven to be such a selfless hero since that rape scene that it almost feels like the writers are trying to make up for it. Or maybe this is just further proof that the rape was executed very badly on the show’s part.
    • That trial was so tense. It felt like a “Law and Order” episode.
    • I vote that Tyrion calls on Brienne to fight for him in the trial. (Please!!)

    “Game of Thrones” airs on Sundays at 9 p.m. EDT on HBO.
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    Zappos Rockit Shop: Hawaiian Heat- Episode 9

    Cast your vote here: http://zapwow.me/pfXS
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    Kimee http://wedgi.es/1kQxMSh
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    Comment below and tell us where Canaan should go next!

    As Mother’s Day approaches, it’s time to think about ordering that perfect gift for mom, and with swim season upon us, what better way to let her know she’s still got it than with an update to her swimwear drawer? Shop women’s styles from Trina Turk, Roxy, Gabriella Rocha, and Christin Michaels while Canaan Rubin rocks Lacoste, Calvin Klein, Levi’s, and more.

    Rockit Shop #10 tease: On the next Rockit Shop, the boys finally get their turn for a fashion face-off as Zappos hosts the Zappos Ride Shop series May 16th in Downtown Las Vegas. The event features pro-skateboarders, contests, and a special performance by Taking Back Sunday. So be sure to tune in to the next Rockit Shop May 19th on Zappos.com.

    Rockit Shop is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

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    ‘Veep’ Season 3 Episode 3 Recap: Selina Dominates The Diss Rankings

    Selina Meyer won HuffPost TV’s “Veep” diss rankings by a landslide this week. In the April 20 episode, “Alicia,” the veep prepared to give the most important speech of her life, announcing her candidacy for president. She also got nailed with an “SNL” spoof, more horrific PR from Mike and a battle over universal child care.

    “Alicia” may have been the HBO show’s most self-aware episode yet. Viewers got to watch a cast of grade A comedians bash “comedians” and hear Julia Louis-Dreyfus call “SNL,” a show she once starred on, “juvenile.” Here are the best one-liners, zingers and lingering disses from “Veep” Season 3 Episode 3, “Alicia.”

    Selina Meyer

    • Dan, this rewrite kicks balls and ass.
    • So what, I had a horse as a kid? Who didn’t? Have a pet is what I meant.
    • If someone takes a shit in your car, what are you going to do? Drop your trou and take a crap through the sunroof? I don’t think so buddy.
    • You start picking this thing apart and what am I left as? Some sort of optimistic warmonger with a soft spot for educated gays?
    • You want me to be just some sort of party puppet? You can stick your hand up my ass and work my mouth?
    • What in the wide world of fuck do you think you’re wearing?
    • I’m supposed to let a bunch of dead-eyed white guys shit all over absolutely everything I stand for?
    • I decided I’m going to let them dictate me because it’s my decision.

    Kent Davison

    • Children are of no value. Forget child care.
    • If you don’t like the reality, go live in Oregon and make quilts with my mother. She could use the help.

    Sue Wilson

    • Ma’am it’s Amy. It sounds like she’s uncomfortable, like she’s with a member of the public.
    • This is your beauty pageant for the nearly dead.

    Ben Caffrey

    • This “Saturday Night Live” shitstorm, it just hit nine on the sphincter scale.

    Mike McLintock

    • I’m trying to help you, you stupid cow!

    Catherine Meyer

    • I have had a hard, lonely, miserable life and the only thing that is going to make it worthwhile is if I become the daughter of the next president of the United States. So, you need to go out there and stop behaving like a little bitch.

    “Veep” airs Sundays at 10:30 p.m. EDT on HBO.
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    Zappos Rockit Shop: The Fashion Week Invasion Continues! – Episode 7

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    Comment below and tell us where Canaan should go next!

    Rockit Shop returns from New York City featuring some of our fiercest competitors yet. With looks self-described as “Fierce” versus “IDGAF,” Keisha and Aerin Nirè duel it out armed with numerous textures, colors, chains, and faux furs. Cast your vote now on which fashionista brought it best!

    Rockit Shop is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

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    Stroke Risk Spikes Shortly After Shingles Episode: Study

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    Zappos Rockit Shop: Frigid Fashion In NYC – Episode 6

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    Welcome to winter’s last blast! As winter weather continues to freeze parts of the US, it’s time to shop for that last line of defense. In this week’s episode, two sophisticated New Yorkers show off their winter looks with an eye ahead to spring (if it ever arrives). Check out the looks from Kristin and Chelsea, and cast your vote for whomever you think rocked it best!

    Rockit Shop is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

    Follow Zappos on Twitter & Instagram! @zappos
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    5 Perfect Quotes From HBO’s ‘Girls’ Season 3, Episode 11

    Here at HuffPost Women, one of the things we love most about Lena Dunham’s HBO show, “Girls,” is the incisive, witty and hilarious dialogue that Dunham and the rest of her writing team come up with every week. So instead of simply recapping Season 3, we decided to pick five quotable gems from each episode.

    Episode 11: “I Saw You”

    In the penultimate episode of season 3, Adam is spending most of his time preparing for his Broadway debut, while Hannah is becoming increasingly insecure — not only in their relationship, but also in her career. Her anxiety grows after she and Elijah pay a visit to Patti LuPone’s home, where Hannah realizes that there’s really only enough room for one star in a relationship. Her frustration and general creative ennui come to head in a GQ advertorial meeting, during which she gets fired from — and subsequently quits — her job. Meanwhile, Jessa is bored out of her mind and sober, but manages to make a (potentially professional) connection with artist B.D. (played by Louise Lasser) at Marnie’s gallery. The rest of the crew attends Marnie’s shockingly un-cringeworthy open-mic performance. The episode comes to an end with a horrified Hannah barging in on Marnie and Ray having casual sex, and in true Hannah fashion, she tells Marnie: “You can never judge me again.”

    girls

    1. Patti LuPone on following your dreams: “The worst thing you can do is subjugate your passion.”

    2. B.D. on aging when you’re a woman: “I hate watching television because all the old women are shells… and it just hurts to be a shell.”

    3. Hannah on the soul-sucking nature of corporate America: “Do you think we were gonna grow up and be in a sweatshop factory for puns? Maybe this is a cooler for dead souls.”

    4. Hannah’s life philosophy: “Everything’s my business.”

    5. Ray on personal boundaries: “This is America, you don’t just barge into someone’s f**king bedroom!”
    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    Zappos Rockit Shop: Las Vegas Fashion In The Park- Episode 5

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    Canaan & the Rockit Shop team hit Fashion In The Park in Las Vegas, NV as two young ladies reveal how they dress up for a night on the town, Vegas style! What happened this night in Vegas is definitely not staying there… From gladiator sandals paired with a cropped black leather jacket to a sun dress accented with a crystal necklace – we’ll show you how to shop these looks and of course let you tell us who wore it best.

    Rockit Shop is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

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    ‘Girls’ Season 3, Episode 8 Recap: ‘Incidentals’

    Note: Do not read on if you have not yet seen Episode 8 of “Girls” Season 3, titled “Incidentals.”

    After last week’s summery, narcissistic “Girls” episode, I was a little worried that the season would only go downhill from there. Luckily, I was wrong.

    Sure, there were no choreographed dance routines in “Incidentals,” but it was still a top-notch episode. We got to see all the girls together again, Patti Lupone showed up and Hannah, Marnie, Jessa and Shoshanna were at their best … and worst.

    With 10 being the most self-involved and 1 being the least, see how each of the girls scored in Season 3, Episode 8 of “Girls” titled “Incidentals.”

    Hannah:

    The episode opens with Hannah sitting at a restaurant waiting for Patti Lupone to show up. She’s pretty impressed with herself, much to the annoyance of the waitress, who has no idea who Patti Lupone is. Unfortunately Hannah never gets to show her off to the waitress because Patti fails to show up, so Hannah goes on a mission to find her. She’s on deadline, after all — she can’t let GQ down!

    Hannah finds Patti at rehearsal, where she agrees to give Hannah five minutes. The two of them discuss the bone density drug that supposedly worked miracles on Patti’s faux-Osteoporosis for about a minute before bonding over their hatred of exercise. Halfway through, Hannah gets a call from Adam: He got cast in a Broadway show!

    Patti isn’t exactly jumping for joy at Hannah’s news. Good luck, she cries — he’ll become an asshole! He’ll cheat! Hannah tries to reassure Patti (and herself) that Adam is actually very funny looking, but Patti isn’t convinced.

    “The elephant man got laid a lot,” she says.

    Meanwhile, back at GQ, Janice & Co. are working on a listicle: 16 Reasons Why We’d Love To Stay At The Gramercy. And she’s picked Hannah to spend the night there with her friends. Even better, she just got her first check from GQ. And it’s more than her rent! So she decides to head to the meatpacking district and “make it rain” before hosting a party at the Gramercy for Adam, his new Broadway pal Desi and all of her friends. Looks like working in advertorial isn’t too shabby after all.

    She didn’t do anything extraordinarily wonderful, but compared to last week Hannah was a saint.

    Overall self-involvement: 5.

    gramercy

    Marnie:

    Well folks, it’s another rough week in Marnie-ville. While she’s innocently piling some mochi onto her yogurt, Soo Jin from her Booth Jonathan days appears behind her. Unlike Marnie, Soo Jin’s doing well. She’s opening her own gallery in NoHo because, she explains, she seriously like DGAF (doesn’t give a fuuuuucckkk).

    Their interaction is a little awkward, and Marnie makes it more awkward when she gives Soo Jin a sideways hug that she holds for a little too long as she says “I’m so happy for you.”

    She heads over to Ray’s later with some pizza, where he swiftly breaks up with her. “I want a girlfriend, Marnie. Like a legitimate girlfriend,” he says, adding, “I realize this doesn’t make sense biologically.”

    “Was this your plan the whole time, Ray? To humiliate the girl you couldn’t get in high school?” she screeches.

    Things start to look up when she makes her way to the Gramercy, receives a heartfelt hug from Hannah and becomes enchanted by Desi. The two start to hum a few tunes together, and it’s pretty cute.

    Also, Marnie has an AOL email address.

    Overall self-involvement: 6.

    girls

    Jessa:

    Just last week, Jessa was spouting inspirational happiness quotes and turning down alcohol. This week, she’s doing coke with her British rehab friend Jasper.

    Jasper found her at her place of work, Sweet Emma. I’m confused both by how Sweet Emma stays in business and how Jasper found her, but he did, and despite Jessa’s halfhearted protest — “I have a job, I eat lunch every day .. I’m healthy! And the last thing I need is to be hanging out with you” — it doesn’t take him long to convince her to do a little coke with him.

    Jasper and Jessa show up high at the Gramercy hotel where Hannah notes that she probably shouldn’t have taken Jessa out of rehab, but Shoshanna’s just excited to be able to have a conversation with people who talk as fast as fast as she does.

    Well, Jessa’s off the bandwagon. And it’s not looking good.

    Overall self-involvement: 9.

    Shoshanna:

    Last week’s outburst was cool, but it looks like Shosh is back to her old self. She doesn’t say anything extraordinarily stupid, but she does deliver one of the best lines of the episode:

    “I recognize you from your part in ‘One Tree Hill.’ You played Lennon the disabled hockey player,” she says to Desi in complete awe.

    As for Hannah, she shares Patti Lupone’s worry also worry that her friend’s relationship is doomed. “Oh my god, are you scared he’s gonna leave you for Sutton Foster?” she asks.

    She may not have seemed like the brightest crayon in the box, but rest assured that Shoshanna is not intellectually unstimulating. Jessa saw her read the newspaper on her phone once.

    Overall self-involvement: 4.

    Girls” airs on Sundays at 10 p.m. EST on HBO.
    Arts – The Huffington Post
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    Zappos Rockit Shop: Frigid Fashion Week Face-Off in NYC- Episode 4

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    Winter is in full swing in the 4th episode of Rockit Shop on Zappos.com! Filmed in sub-freezing temperatures in New York City, host Canaan Rubin braves the 27 degree weather at Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week and catches a pair of brave British fashion bloggers who clearly put style ahead of staying warm. In this episode of Rockit Shop and learn how to do both- Canaan wouldn’t have it any other way! Follow the contestants: Tamara @theglamandglitter & Claire @iamchouquette, and as always, Cast your vote now on which Brit brought it best!

    Rockit Shop is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

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    5 Perfect Quotes From HBO’s ‘Girls’ Season 3, Episode 7

    Here at HuffPost Women, one of the things we love most about Lena Dunham’s HBO show, “Girls,” is the incisive, witty and hilarious dialogue that Dunham and the rest of her writing team come up with every week. So instead of simply recapping Season 3, we decided to pick five quotable gems from each episode.

    Episode 7: “Beach House”

    Marking the start of the second half of the season, this episode offered some of the most gratifying dialogue of the series so far. Marnie, uptight as ever, hosts a girls weekend at her mom’s friend Suzanne’s beach house (because who doesn’t have a mom’s friend Suzanne?) where she hopes the four girls can “heal” — at least as far as social media is concerned. When a scantily-clad Hannah runs into Elijah on the street, the two reconcile, and Hannah invites him and a few hangers on back to Marnie’s. This disrupts Marnie’s plans for an extravagant French meal for four and enough wine-fueled nostalgia to cancel out two years of passive aggression. Eventually, the night gives way to dancing and derision, and Shosh droops some of the most incredibly satisfying truth bombs we’ve ever heard.

    girlss3e72

    1. Hannah on “Spring Breakers”: “I thought that movie was the perfect blend of art and commerce.”

    2. Jessa’s #1 rule for swimming: “I can’t go in open water unless I’m menstruating.”

    3. Marnie on the realities of modern friendship: “Guys, we’re so disconnected now. I thought that this would be a good opportunity to have fun together and prove to everyone via Instagram that we can still have fun as a group.”

    4. Shosh calling Hannah out on her well-documented narcissism: “Seriously, I have never met anyone who thinks their life is so f**king fascinating. I wanted to fall asleep in my own vomit all day listening to you talk about how you bruise more easily than other people.”

    5. Jessa defending Shoshanna’s intellect: “I’m going to stick up for Shosh on this one and say that I actually have seen her read the newspaper on her phone.”

    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    5 Perfect Quotes From HBO’s ‘Girls’ Season 3, Episode 6

    Here at HuffPost Women, one of the things we love most about Lena Dunham’s HBO show, “Girls,” is the incisive, witty and hilarious dialogue that Dunham and the rest of her writing team come up with every week. So instead of simply recapping Season 3, we decided to pick five quotable gems from each episode.

    Episode 6: “Free Snacks”

    This week we see Hannah putting her big-girl pants on, quitting her job at Ray’s and entering corporate America as a sponsored content write for GQ. Although she’s initially seduced by the free snack room and praise from her cool-as-a-cucumber boss (played by the ever-stylish Jenna Lyons), she quickly becomes terrified that a 9-5 job that isn’t quite “spiritually fulfilling” will destroy her ability to be a “real writer.” Meanwhile, Jessa is forcefully selling black christening dresses to rich Brooklyn moms, Shosh has decided to “unchoose” her reckless lifestyle and find a for-real, serious boyfriend, and Ray and Marnie are taking the first, tentative steps toward a beyond-sex romantic connection. Of course, they also end up in a restaurant during lunchtime yelling at each other about Africa and western aid over dumplings. But, as we all know, the course of true love temporary companionship never did run smooth.

    1. Hannah accepting praise: “Yeah, I feel like that wasn’t as re-tweeted as it should have been, so I appreciate the support.”

    2. Shosh on Ray’s basketball skills: “Ray really seems to have the respect of his peers on the court.” Jessa: “That’s amazing. It’s really hard for a Jew to gain respect in sports.”

    3. Hannah suggesting types of men at her new GQ job: “The Kaballer. He’s a little sleazy. He’s like, out looking for sex. But he’s wearing Kaballah bracelets so you know he’s spiritual. He’d like fuck some serious enlightenment into you.”

    4. Jenna Lyons, as Hannah’s boss, on her ideas: “Neiman Marcus doesn’t sell a widow’s peak, but worth considering.”

    5. A fashion truth from Joe, Hannah’s coworker: “Fedoras are worse than genocide.”

    Honorable Mention…
    Adam on why he goes to acting auditions: “I just like reading emotional cues from strangers in a high-pressure situation.”

    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    Zappos Rockit Shop: Melrose Avenue Fashion Face-Off- Episode 3

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    Comment below and tell us where Canaan should go next!

    In this third episode of the Rockit Shop, Canaan catches up with a pair of California teens shopping on the always trendy Melrose Avenue. Katie and Kelsey are rocking their “beachy” best. From studded ankle boots to Coach wristlets and metal chain Minkoff bags, these ladies personify the laid-back L.A. lifestyle. Which California girl do you think rocked the look best- Katie or Kelsey? Cast your vote now!

    Rockit Shop is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

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    5 Perfect Quotes From HBO’s ‘Girls’ Season 3, Episode 5

    Here at HuffPost Women, one of the things we love most about Lena Dunham’s HBO show, “Girls,” is the incisive, witty and hilarious dialogue that Dunham and the rest of her writing team come up with every week. So instead of simply recapping Season 3, we decided to pick five quotable gems from each episode.

    Episode 5: “Only Child”

    Any emotional capital Hannah earned at the end of last week’s episode was pretty much obliterated this week. In perhaps our favorite cameo so far, Jennifer Westfeldt plays the grieving wife of Hannah’s presumed-gay (and definitely deceased) editor, David. His widow accidentally reveals to Hannah that her book probably won’t come out. “My book is dead?” she exclaims — yes, at a funeral. Meanwhile, Ray’s invective-turned-seduction leads to an awkward, tabletop hook-up with Marnie. Another publisher offers to print Hannah’s memoir in a hilarious exchange between a high-powered female publisher and her hapless assistant. But what would our favorite millennial Bildungsroman be without a few legal roadblocks? Misdirecting her anger over a potential three-year delay in her literary aspirations, Hannah ends up kicking Adam’s sister out of their apartment.

    hannah small

    1. A newly-widowed Jennifer Westfeldt on her late husband’s reputation: “A lot of people think he was gay. And you know, he was sometimes.”

    2. Hannah’s philosophy on conflict resolution: “I have watched enough ‘Dr. Phil’ and ‘Intervention’ to know you can work anything out, if you just talk about it.”

    3. Shosh schooling Jessa on adulthood: “If you’re serious about improving yourself. You need to do more than just smoke Dorff-cigarettes. You need to grocery shop and condition your hair, even though it does so well with natural oils.”

    4. Hannah on her personal brand: “Well I’m from the Midwest, so I will always be 15 to 45 pounds overweight depending on how far I live from the coast. [The] further I am from the coast, the fatter I am.”

    5. Ray on Marnie’s millennial ambivalence: “You come across like you’re better than everyone, and you want no part of their lives, and then when you’re excluded from things you’re outrageously offended and hold a grudge.”
    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    Zappos Rockit Shop: What to Wear- Party Dresses- Episode 2

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    In this episode of the Rockit Shop, Canaan meets the lovely Carlotta and the fiery Catalina, and each of them describes what they’re rocking with their dresses to complete their look. Who wore it better? You decide on this episode of the Rockit Shop!

    Rockit Shop is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

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    ‘American Horror Story: Coven’ Episode 11 Recap: Blood Ties

    Note: Do not read on unless you’ve seen “American Horror Story: Coven,” Episode 11, titled “Protect The Coven.”

    Sometimes when I settle in to watch “American Horror Story: Coven,” after the first few major developments of each episode, I feel like I’ve returned to the start of the show. It’s like I forgot to save a video game and I’m back several chapters and achievements, with all that time wasted. In other words, nothing that happens on “Coven” has any consequence; the words “dead,” “alive,” “magic,” and “witch” basically have no meaning. Queenie’s alive? OK. She was dead (at least gone for us) for quite some time. Kyle’s here! Where has he been? The Axeman? Ugh, you’re still here? You girls have what magic now? I can’t even keep track. Spalding?! Spalding’s … er … still dead, but alive in the attic?! Everything is just so nonsensical and convenient that it can be downright infuriating.

    OK, whew, I had to get that out of the way. Now, if I look at tonight’s episode in a completely detached manner, I have to say I enjoyed it way more than last week’s mediocre midseason return. This week had gore (and plenty of it), scenes that were actually difficult to watch (some for a bad reason), and several great lines of dialogue. Approaching “Coven” as a series of insane vignettes is really the only way to do it justice. It simply cannot be judged as a normal TV show would. With that in mind…

    Madame LaLaurie and her bloodlust are the obvious focus of this episode. Is she truly a monster? Yes, it turns out she is. This passive housemaid of the past few episodes is nothing like the LaLaurie we first met on “Coven,” when she was torturing her slaves and daughters down in the cellar. We flash back to 1830 and witness her moving to New Orleans from Paris, and see how her penchant for cutting off limbs and disemboweling living creatures has manifested. By cutting a head off a chicken (nice, cute touch: my thoughts immediately went to her head in the box), LaLaurie’s remorseless violence is unleashed. She finds an injured slave and, well, does what she does.

    (This is a total aside, and probably best to discuss in a bigger forum, but two things really bothered me about the slave/gardener torture sequences in this episode. One, they were really gratuitous, and this is coming from a horror fan. Slave torture isn’t something I’m comfortable watching. Ever. And to draw it out, showing most of it, is tasteless. Which leads me to the second thing: in this particular climate, where the issue of slavery is very prominent in current pop culture, I’m having trouble understanding why Murphy & Co. are so blatantly displaying slavery torture. It’s almost like a slap in the face to the seriousness of it. Also, if you’ve recently watched “12 Years A Slave,” as I have, the torture scenes will be just unbearable in the context of a campy, oft-comedic show.)

    Thank goodness there’s nothing but levity in between the gory bits, or else this would have been a really tough slog. Indeed, the greatest ability of “Coven” is to push you to the brink (i.e. – turning your head away from the screen) and then back again (i.e. – your face hurts from laughing at Angela Bassett’s latest remark). Even at Nan’s funeral, all the players get together and say goodbye at what’s supposed to be a grim occasion. Instead they barely care about Nan’s passing (Madison: “Have you met me?”), and Queenie interrupts whatever actual mourning is going on when she arrives with LaLaurie on a leash. Queenie has also somehow gotten LaLaurie’s head back on, which is a new power she seems to have attained, among others that we’re not aware of yet.

    Back at Robichaux, LaLaurie is forced to return to her housemaid status. In one of my favourite scenes so far on “Coven,” we take a delightful romp through the house with LaLaurie as she takes care of each of the houseguests, cleaning, cooking and tidying. It’s fun to watch her deal with each character’s eccentricities and attitude, and then watch it come to a head when the poor gardener cuts his hand with shears. LaLaurie sees his bleeding, dripping hand and it all comes back to her: the torturing, slicing, the thirst for blood. She tells Cordelia that she’ll take care of the gardener, and proceeds to take him upstairs to Spalding’s doll room and basically mutilate him. Again, sorry, this scene I couldn’t watch.

    When she looks up from her dirty work, there’s Spalding. Dead? Yep. Alive? Yep. I can’t tell you what’s going on with him. No idea. Regardless, he’s there, and he admires LaLaurie’s work, calling it “art.” Hmm, OK. In exchange for her retrieving him a rare doll from 1895, he tells her he’ll give her pills to make Marie mortal, so LaLaurie can kill her. When he busts out the Benadryl and LaLaurie couldn’t possibly know what the pills actually do, I thought Spalding was punishing her for her gruesome act. But no, he was just doing that so she’d get Marie out of the way. He knocks Marie out, she falls down the stairs, and advises LaLaurie to bury her. The cock of her eyebrow indicates that that’s probably exactly what she’s going to do.

    Queenie has moved back into Robichaux, but you’d barely know it (where was she as Marie was being attacked by Spalding and LaLaurie?). After she tells off Cordelia in a very harsh way (and might I add, undeserved), she doesn’t appear again. I guess she’s on reserve for next week, when her random powers will come in handy. Straight-up, I hated Queenie in this episode. How does she have any reason to be angry at anybody? She abandoned the coven. Ugh, she’d better not be Supreme. Anyway, her vitriolic chat with Cordelia sends the headmistress over the edge. She takes a pair of gardening clippers to the eyes, re-blinding herself so she can regain her second sight. For future reference, Cordelia, there has to be a better way — couldn’t you just ask one of the other witches to put you into a deep sleep and do it humanely? Geez.

    In another part of town, Delphi is pissed. Hank’s father is certain the witches are behind his company’s disintegration, and he’s right. In what isn’t the best move in these circumstances, he vows to make a deal with them, and when they finally trust him, kill them all. Talk about gross underestimation. These guys are the worst witchhunters ever! When he and his partners meet with Marie and Fiona, it’s clear that it’s he and his business buddies who’ll end up dead, not the witches. In a “fun” gore scene (this is the kind of “AHS” I love), the witchhunters get picked off by Fiona’s lover, The Axeman, while Marie texts on her phone and Fiona sips a filthy martini. I always enjoy a good boardroom killing scene. Nothing says love…

    And speaking of love, what in the hell was that end scene? We’re supposed to believe that Zoe and Kyle are some star-crossed lovers, fated to be together. Why? Because she kills every man who sleeps with her, and Kyle is the only one who can survive it? Because she accepts the fact that he’s already died, and now he’s not all there? I don’t know where this suddenly came from, but when Myrtle was talking about their pure and true love, I was trying to think of where and when Zoe and Kyle ever outwardly displayed it. It’s been lukewarm in public at best, right? Anyway, Myrtle gives them bus tickets to Epcot (classic), and they’re on their way in a bizarre episode-ending running shot as they get on the bus to Orlando. Not like it matters anyway, because you know those two will be back next week. As much as I want to believe it, we’re not going to see them enjoying the World Showcase at Epcot.

    Witch, Please: (every week I’m going to award the witchiest witch of them all) This is a tough one, since no one really used their powers this week. I guess it has to go to Madison for fighting with Zoe and knocking stuff off the wall, and nailing Zoe in the head with a light fixture. Say, were there any repercussions from that? Guess not. Also, Madison had some amazing lines this week.

    Random Thoughts:

    • The plotline involving Fiona and The Axeman is too boring for me to get into. They were talking about moving to some farm or something, to be free from his axe and her coven. I sincerely hope the last scene of “Coven” isn’t the pair driving out of New Orleans in a pickup or sitting on the farm’s porch. Oh God, that’s totally how it’s going to end, isn’t it?
    • The second-last scene, of Spalding back in his nightie holding the baby Marie was supposed to give to Papa Legba, was so disturbing I think I repressed it. I don’t care if a man is obsessed with dolls, but there’s a creepy line to cross, and “AHS” spewed blood all over that line. It’s also clear what’ll happen here: Spalding will be left in the coven with the little girl to raise, ensuring the coven lives on.
    • When Myrtle is explaining that Zoe must leave, Zoe’s quote is the best: “I’m so lost here.” Yes, we know. That phrase works on so many levels.
    • When Spalding turned the 1895 doll around in his hands and smelled its bum, I didn’t know whether to laugh or cringe.
    • Madison: “You flush my shit, bitch.”
    • Come to think of it, LaLaurie’s preceding comment, “You left your dirt in the commode,” is actually funnier.
    • Myrtle, who’s writing your dialogue? “In the fall, the rotting leaves smell like an Olympian’s ejaculate!” I’ve never heard anything like that — ever — in my 30ish years of TV watching.
    • LaLaurie: “Well, turds on that!”

    Episode 10 Recap
    Episode 9 Recap
    Episode 8 Recap
    Episode 7 Recap
    Episode 6 Recap
    Episode 5 Recap
    Episode 4 Recap
    Episode 3 Recap
    Episode 2 Recap
    Episode 1 Recap


    Entertainment – The Huffington Post
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    Zappos Rockit Shop: What to Wear to the Beach- Episode 1

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    In this inaugural episode of Rockit, celebrity host Canaan Rubin takes to the warms shores of South Beach to find out what to wear to the beach and see who rocks it better- Nina or Breezy.

    Rockit is presented by Zappos (http://zapwow.me/pf3C) where you can shop all the looks you saw here today, as well as all the latest trends in fashion. Zappos carries everything you need from shoes and clothing to hats, accessories, beauty, and more!

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    ‘American Horror Story: Coven’ Episode 5 Recap: Mommy Dearest

    Note: Do not read on unless you’ve seen “American Horror Story: Coven,” Episode 5, titled “Burn, Witch, Burn.”

    The overarching theme in tonight’s episode is the relationship (or lack thereof) between mothers and daughters. It couldn’t have been easy for Cordelia to grow up with a mother like Fiona, what with the philandering, the absenteeism, and the whole “Youngest Supreme Ever” thing. But I would take Fiona as a mother any day over LaLaurie. In the opening flashback, we see LaLaurie treating her daughters like absolute s**t, even threatening to fill one of her daughters’ mouths with … yep, s**t. The other two don’t fare much better, with one hanging by both arms and the other in a cage down in the slave dungeon for a year. (It’s hard to reconcile the former brutal LaLaurie with the current timid LaLaurie, but that’s a whole other topic.)

    Once we’re back at Robichaux Academy, we see that the cast of Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” video is still gathered on the lawn, but nothing’s happening. The zombies stand in place, seemingly awaiting some sort of instruction. Flash quickly to Marie Laveau, who’s levitating over a chalk drawing in the back room of her hair salon. Her eyes flick open, and she says in her great, threatening voice, “Begin!” That sets the zombies in motion, who immediately head towards the Academy. Sexy neighbor boy (his name is Luke, but for whatever reason I can never recall it… OK, Luke. Luke. Luke) tries to be all brave, thinking the zombies are just teenagers in costume, but oops. They’re not. He gets injured pretty severely, but not bitten, and is rescued by Nan and Zoe.

    Let’s talk for a minute here about Zoe. It’s one thing for Nan to go running out there to save her love interest, and besides, she’s never been one to shy away from anything. But Zoe? The meek, mild girl with the overly modest wardrobe, taking charge? Something is happening to Zoe, and it’s evident here as she wields a bloody chainsaw, hacking away at the zombies like some “Evil Dead” renegade, that she’s evolving. She must be the next Supreme, absorbing some of Fiona’s aggression and confidence along with her magic — which we also see. After being cornered by the zombies, Zoe utters one phrase and every single zombie falls to the ground, once again lifeless. Marie also plummets to the floor of her salon, her spell rendered useless. Marie expresses fear at the unknown power, which lets us know that damn, whatever Zoe’s got, it’s nothing to scoff at.

    Inside the house, Spalding, Queenie and LaLaurie are hiding in the bedroom, and then LaLaurie stupidly tries to communicate with one of her zombie daughters, Borquita (quite the name), who proceeds to strangle her, throw her to the ground and head upstairs for Queenie and Spalding. Queenie’s voodoo doll magic is useless, and Spalding is only good at cleaning up dead bodies, not actually making them dead, so LaLaurie is forced to “kill” her own daughter, for lack of a better word.

    The other mother-and-daughter combo is, of course, Fiona and Cordelia, and the latter is still in a hospital bed recovering from the acid attack. It completely destroyed her optic nerves, yet left the eyes physically intact. Fiona’s informed that Cordelia will be blind for life, and it sends her into a tailspin. She attacks the doctor, finds the Medication Room at the hospital and opens it with her fingernails (natch), and treats the room like it’s a pill buffet. Completely high, she wanders the creepy hospital in a stupor. And then it’s Obvious Metaphor time as Fiona stumbles upon a room with a woman who just gave birth to a stillborn baby girl. The doctors apparently just left the corpse of the dead baby in the room with the mother, since they do that in hospitals. Fiona revives the dead baby after making the mother recite every cliché mother-daughter saying in the book, and we know that this is Fiona’s way of making up for her terrible treatment of Cordelia.

    As I predicted last week, this injury has brought out the power in Cordelia. Whether it was deliberate by the attacker to bestow this gift upon her, or if it was in her all along, we don’t know yet, but one thing we do know is her new power kicks ass. When her asshole husband finally shows up at the hospital hours later, he takes Cordelia’s hand, and she immediately jolts up in bed and opens her (now white) eyes. She sees it all — the sex, the murder, all of it. It seems, like Zoe, that Cordelia has gained some serious powers here.

    We can’t forget that the Council is still in town, too, and they’re back at the Academy while Fiona, Zoe, Nan and LaLaurie are incinerating the zombie bodies in a big bonfire. Fiona shuts down LaLaurie’s attempts for them to bond over their failings as mothers, which is just classic. Fiona’s on her A-game now (must’ve been all those pills), and she manages to sway the Council against Myrtle, who she accuses of murdering Madison and blinding Cordelia. In the presence of overwhelming evidence — the burned hand, the very incriminating photo collage on the hotel room wall (seriously, criminals, stop making collages of your intended victim), and her obvious resentment — the Council condemns Myrtle to death by fire. “I go proudly to the flame!” she proclaims, and doesn’t try to defy Fiona, which I found a little odd.

    So it’s off to the pyre/stake/death pile. In their funereal best, the ladies and the Council all head to the quarry to bid farewell to the seemingly treacherous Myrtle. Fiona lights the fire with her cigarette, and into the eternal goes Myrtle. Or so we were led to believe, though I knew this wasn’t the last we’d see of her. Our favorite bayou queen, Misty, saunters over to the pyre and resurrects Myrtle. Uh oh, this is quite the pairing. Nothing a little swamp mud can’t cure.

    At the end, we see an exchange between Queenie and Fiona, and learn that it was Queenie’s voodoo witchery that made the burns appear on Myrtle’s hand. Myrtle didn’t actually do anything, except make that creepy photo collage. Fiona assuages Queenie’s feelings of guilt by making her believe that she’s the next Supreme (a “Supreme of Color”), in yet another faux mother-daughter moment. Fiona makes false promises about taking Queenie under her wing, which seems to work for now.

    Spalding can just spray air freshener over Madison, his dead prize, to clear the air, but unfortunately Fiona doesn’t have that luxury. Soon, she’ll have to face the music about what she’s done. It may just be too late for her to make amends, which I’m not too convinced she wants to do anyway. Remember, folks: her ultimate goals are to retain her youth and keep hold of her powers, which are both slipping away each and every episode.

    Witch, Please: (every week I’m going to award the witchiest witch of them all) At the risk of being repetitive, it has to be Fiona this week. She resurrected a dead baby, commanded the Council: “You will sit!” (which was incredible), and did the whole nails-as-ID-card swipe at the hospital. So cool.

    Other Random Thoughts:

    • A “Medication Room” at a hospital? Clearly marked? I can think of so many reasons why that’s a terrible, terrible idea.
    • One more thing about that hospital: Is it just me or is it the worst hospital of all time? Nearly every single light was either flickering or out altogether. And I don’t think pediatric doctors would leave a dead baby corpse in a room with a traumatized mother. Seriously. Unless the whole thing was a hallucination, which I suppose is possible. There was a guy wandering the halls wearing just a diaper, after all.
    • Did anyone else hear Fiona say that she would be back to Cordelia’s room in 15 minutes? If so, that’s some bad editing, because before we know it, she’s back at the Academy burning the bodies in the bonfire.
    • Full well knowing that a lot of crazy stuff has been happening in New Orleans lately — you know, the zombies, the Minotaur, Madison “missing,” voodoo priestesses on the hunt, etc. — the coven leaves Myrtle’s charred corpse just LYING there?! Fully open and available for anyone or anything to come calling? Honestly, after that screw-up, they deserve anything that comes their way. At least wait until the body is ash, or take it with you. Geez.
    • Where, exactly, does one buy stylish witch-burnin’ funeral clothes? The witches seem to have a good selection of dapper outfits, especially Zoe rocking that hat.
    • I’m a fan of Dr. John’s “Right Place, Wrong Time,” and yes, the title makes complete sense in the context, but that song is forever and always associated with “Dazed And Confused,” so it felt out of place while the witches were walking to the burning. But that’s just a personal opinion.
    • I loved Fiona telling off Hank: “You’re a loser. You’re one step up from the men who stand in front of Home Depot.”

    Episode 4 Recap
    Episode 3 Recap
    Episode 2 Recap
    Episode 1 Recap


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    ‘American Horror Story: Coven’ Episode 4 Recap: It’s War

    Note: Do not read on unless you’ve seen “American Horror Story: Coven,” Episode 4, titled “Fearful Pranks Ensue.”

    It’s pretty much an all-out war in New Orleans. At the very least there’s a big one brewing, and this week’s episode pits multiple warring factions against each other: Fiona vs. Delia, Fiona vs. The Council, Fiona vs. Marie (OK, so it’s mostly everyone against Fiona), and the voodoo witches vs. the Robichaux witches. Also the battle between the “living” and the dead — but we’ll see more of that next week.

    To start things off in the ugliest possible manner, we flash back to New Orleans in 1961, where a young black boy is lynched and hanged by a bunch of white men. Marie is understandably pissed, especially after the boy’s mother expresses her optimism for the future of racial integration. So it’s time for snakes, blood and raising the dead, at which Marie is obviously very skilled. Did she just drink an urn of flaming blood? Yes, she did, and corpses tear out of their graves and attack the lynchers, ripping their limbs off and disemboweling them. Welcome to Episode 4 of “American Horror Story: Coven”!

    After the flashback, we return right where we left off at Robichaux Academy, with Spalding unceremoniously rolling up the deceased Madison in the sitting room rug. It’s priceless to see her sparkly high heels sticking out at the end, like some filling in a ridiculous corpse fajita. Fiona alleviates any possible guilt or remorse (which she probably didn’t have much of) by saying that Madison would have made a terrible Supreme anyway — and then proceeds to find Queenie almost dead in Delia’s greenhouse. Never a dull night for the Supreme!

    She shuttles Queenie up to a bedroom and literally breathes the life back into her. LaLaurie is grateful to Queenie for saving her from the Minotaur, and is absolutely beside herself, not knowing how to be kind to this black girl who she was calling “slave” in Episode 3. Power shifts are the best, especially when we know how vitriolic Queenie can be. Fiona has to wake Delia up and let her know about everything. I mean, honestly Delia, how did you sleep through someone getting killed on the floor below you, as well as a Minotaur attack? Fiona isn’t far off when she says Delia is a useless headmistress; Fiona is usually drunk and traipsing around town, yet she has a better handle on things at the Academy — and has a solid lock on revenge when she sends the Minotaur’s severed head (still blinking) to Marie.

    This, of course, does not go over well, and despite attempts by a fellow salon worker to get Marie to let it go, Angela Bassett‘s flared nostrils tell us exactly what she’s going to do: gather up all those snakes and blood again, cuz it’s time for another corpse raisin’! Things are also going from bad to worse back at the Academy, where The Council on Witchcraft has come a-calling. I was overcome with joy seeing Frances Conroy’s Myrtle Snow sashay into the house, with that outfit. (There’s nary an actress I enjoy more, and she is all aces here.) At her side are two fellow Council members, Quentin (Leslie Jordan), who specializes in sarcastic, witty rejoinders, and Cecily (Robin Bartlett), who appears to be the keeper of minutes. They conduct a series of interrogations of the Robichaux inhabitants, who basically perform as we expect them to: Delia spills every single bean (sigh), Zoe puts us to sleep with her testimony, Nan is straight-forward and inadvertently hilarious, and Queenie tosses it all out there, calling the missing Madison a stone-cold bitch.

    Before Fiona takes the stand, we’re treated to a delicious 1971 flashback, right after Annaleigh’s death. It introduces us to the young, jealous Myrtle, who is willing to do anything to take down Fiona. As a “guardian of veracity in the vernacular,” Myrtle is a defender of the truth. In the end, her scheming to trap Fiona ends up trapping her; on the stand, between cigarette drags, Fiona denies all wrong-doing, and sasses the Council. In the flashback, we learn how Spalding really lost his tongue (he cut it off to protect Fiona). Is it just me or was that actually really touching? OK, it was gross and extreme, but romantic in “AHS” terms. Young Fiona’s look of shock when he does it shows that she’s no monster, and there’s at least a semblance of caring on her part. So when Spalding’s questioned by Myrtle, he ends up implicating her instead of Fiona. So great — and when Myrtle yells, “This will not stand!” I smiled, mainly because it’s been so damn long since I’ve seen a Frances Conroy freak-out.

    Other than the main plot, we’re treated to two totally superfluous sideplots — one of which is Delia’s cheating husband, Hank, who we see is clearly unbalanced. His rough sex and weird sidelong glances tell us something is definitely wrong here. And when he breaks out a silenced pistol (which indicates he planned to kill his mistress all along) and shoots her in the head, I threw my hands up in the air. No clue what’s happening there, and more importantly, why should any of us care? Secondly, we revisit FrankenKyle, who’s slamming his head against the bathtub repeatedly. Sure, Zoe, go make him some tuna salad. That’ll make him feel better. When she returns to the bathroom, he’s gone, off into the night on Halloween. At least he’ll fit right in. I guess it’s wishful thinking that this is the last we’ll see of FrankenKyle.

    Thank goodness the final two scenes are both creepy and titillating, as LaLaurie’s three zombie daughters show up at the door with a league of other zombies waiting on the front lawn. How is Fiona going to stop this insanity? (She’s out drinking with Delia playing “Three Questions,” and Delia is blinded by something in the washroom. Maybe this will finally bring out Delia’s powers.)

    I’ll leave you for this week with a nod to (easily) the creepiest scene of the episode, which was Spalding having tea parties in a room filled with scary dolls. When he takes out that lace gown and brings it over to the chair and we see Madison’s dead body holding a teacup, several thoughts rushed through my mind: Oh no, is this a necrophilia thing? Does he just play dress-up with her? Is he dressed like a baby? What. Is. Happening. I refuse to believe that Spalding is that sick — for now — and just hope that his unrequited love for Fiona is what’s causing him to do it.

    It’s war now, “AHS” fans. Let’s see how this thing pans out.

    Witch, Please: (every week I’m going to award the witchiest witch of them all) Damn right a voodoo priestess counts as a witch, and Marie Laveau takes the crown this week. She spends most of her screen time writhing with snakes, blood and fire, so no one can really compare. Plus, raising the dead multiple times is a pretty amazing feat.

    Other Random Thoughts:

    • Interesting that Madison wasn’t the next Supreme (heart murmur!). Who is it, then? Nan? Zoe? Delia? So many interesting possibilities.
    • We now know two of the Seven Wonders: transmutation and pyrokinesis. Once we figure out all seven, we should be able to figure out who the next Supreme is.
    • Loved the “hot guy” neighbor showing up with baked goods for Nan. All together now: awwwwwww!
    • Myrtle’s red leather gloves. Could any of you avoid staring at them?
    • Angela Bassett rocked multiple hairstyles tonight. From the braids to the afro, this woman is capable of any ‘do.
    • Spalding’s fingernails nearly made me puke. The poor guy needs a major overhaul … though the creepy doll scenes helped me understand why no one screws with him. He also cut off his own tongue, so yeah.

    Episode 3 Recap
    Episode 2 Recap
    Episode 1 Recap


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