Rites of Passage: Excavating My Childhood Photos — and Myself

I wanted to uncover ancient shards of my childhood gender and piece them back into the whole.
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The First Time: Shirley Manson: The First Time I Cut Myself

Trapped in an unhealthy relationship, this musician found relief and power in self-harming. Today, she vigilantly avoids the patterns that got her there.
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Boyega: Star Wars allowed me to invest in myself

At 26 years old John Boyega is already expanding his CV.
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‘Got myself a fiancee’: Ed Sheeran is engaged

Singer Ed Sheeran has announced he is engaged to girlfriend Cherry Seaborn.
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Gyllenhaal: ‘I take myself very seriously’

Jake Gyllenhaal is a serious actor. From Donnie Darko to Brokeback Mountain, he has built a reputation for taking on complex characters and making them real.
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Kelly Clarkson: ‘When I was really skinny I wanted to kill myself’

The US singer admits contemplating suicide amid pressure to stay thin.
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Modern Love: Single, Unemployed and Suddenly Myself

After hooking up with a much younger man, a woman realizes she has been looking for love all wrong.
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Jourdan Dunn on Her Two Met Gala 2016 Balmain Looks: ‘I Felt Really Good About Myself’

If you thought Jourdan Dunn killed it with her two Met Gala looks—both by Balmain—you’re not the only one. The British model herself agrees with you. “Last night I felt really good about myself,” she told PeopleStyle when we caught up with her on the set of a campaign shoot today. She paired the look with Stuart Weitzman heels and Eva Fehren jewelry.

Jourdan Dunn Met Gala 2016David Fisher/REX/Shutterstock; Kevin Mazur/Getty


Dunn fell right in line with the night’s overall trend: Bold silver gowns with a robot-like inspiration, a perfect fit for the Met Gala’s theme of ‘Manus x Machina: Fashion in an Age of Technology.’ Kim Kardashian, Kylie Kardashian, Kris Jenner, Cindy Crawford, Alessandra Ambrosio and Doutzen Kroes joined Dunn in wearing Balmain and, together, they walked the carpet as the #BalmainArmy, a hashtag the fashion house created in the past (and has stuck as a way to describe fans of the brand).

Instagram Photo

For Dunn’s look, she worked directly with Balmain creative director Olivier Rousteing. “Olivier sent two sketches—one was a short one and one was a long one,” she explained. “I was drawn to the long one, I thought it was amazing. When I had my fitting for it, it all came together.” As soon as her glam squad got a whiff of the direction, they suggested she pair the look with gray, silvery hair. “I thought it was a cool idea,” she said.

Instagram Photo

But despite the fact that she looked calm and collected in all of the photos, she admitted it’s actually a very nerve-wracking experience. “There are people everywhere, like waiting for you to walk out of your hotel and then all the paparazzi,” she said. “ It’s huge. So I was in the car, and I was nervous. But once I got on the red carpet, I just had to own it and feel myself.”

Instagram Photo

RELATED PHOTOS: Every Gorgeous Gown at the 2016 Met Gala

It’s a long way that she’s come from her first gala appearance in 2009 (below, with Karlie Kloss). “I remember when I first attended seven years ago, I felt so out of place and like I shouldn’t really be there,” she said. “Now I feel I do deserve to be here, I’ve worked hard. I like being in that mind frame.”

Jourdan Dunn First Met Gala LookErik C. Pendzich/REX/Shutterstock


After the gala concluded, Dunn slipped into a black sequined mini Balmain to head downtown to the Gilded Lily after-party. “The second look is all about being able to move and dance and just feel good,” she said. “With a Balmain dress, sometimes that’s a bit impossible because they’re so structured. But in my fitting, Olivier wanted to make sure I was able to move. It’s all about something fun and be able to move and get down in and look good in.”

But she didn’t change in the car. “Some people do that but I went back to my hotel, chilled, refreshed my makeup and changed really quick and headed out,” she said. (And no, the Army did not travel together.)

RELATED PHOTOS: The Biggest Trends at the 2016 Met Gala

So, how can regular people get into the #BalmainArmy? There’s no boot camp, unfortunately, she said. “I don’t know how I became a member,” she added, “but I’m happy to be in the army.”

Which Jourdan Dunn look did you like better: Met Gala or after-party? Tell us in the comments below!

—Sharon Clott Kanter


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Chris Brown: I hated myself

Chris Brown shared a touching open letter with fans via social media on Thursday, in which he detailed some of his darkest moments.
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See the Next Epic BFF-Filled Music Video: Nicki Minaj and Beyonce’s “Feeling Myself”

Coachella need not advertise any longer, thanks to Beyonce and Nicki Minaj filming their music video for "Feeling Myself" there—and only making it look like the best time ever, flower crowns, pool parties, and all….




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Nicki Minaj And Beyoncé Have An Awesome Summer Party In ‘Feeling Myself’ Video

Tidal subscribers were in luck on Monday when Nicki Minaj and Beyoncé dropped the video for “Feeling Myself” exclusively on the streaming service. The song, which appears on Minaj’s “The Pinkprint,” first leaked online last December. And now the video for “Feeling Myself” has leaked.

In the video, Minaj and Queen Bey play with squirt guns in inflatable pools in pink fur coats, eat cheeseburgers in a bounce house, have a champagne pool party and share Now and Laters. It’s pretty much the summer party of your dreams. (And proof that bucket hats only look good on Beyoncé.)

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Beyoncé previously released her video for her new song “Die With You” on the artist-owned streaming service last month. Soon after, Rihanna released her video for “American Oxygen” and Jay Z released his music video for “Glory” via Tidal. There are also rumors that a possible Jay Z and Beyoncé joint album will exclusively premiere on Tidal, proving that the streaming service is serious about rewarding its users, especially after Jay Z’s special Tidal shows over the weekend.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

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LeBron: Got to protect myself a little more

After being the recipient of a second flagrant foul in his past three games, Cleveland Cavaliers forward LeBron James said he might have to take matters into his own hands in the future.
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Defending Myself From the Knee Defender

Legendary football coach Vince Lombardi once uttered the phrase, “The best defense is a good offense.” I plan to turn those words into action the next time I fly coach class.

By now everybody is familiar with the escalating brouhaha over personal space when flying. The skies seemed reasonably friendly until August 24, aboard United Flight 1462 between Newark and Denver. A female passenger trying to recline her coach seat was thwarted by the Knee Defender, a device the male passenger seated behind her had clipped to his tray table. She complained; he refused to remove the device. She threw water at him and the pilot made an unscheduled landing in Chicago, where both passengers were ordered to extricate themselves from the plane — no easy matter when crammed in coach. Since then, two similar disputes have caused the rerouting of flights.

I’m not surprised there was confrontation aboard Flight 1462; after all, it did originate in New Jersey. What shocked me was how many air travelers, through blogs and social media posts, defended Knee Defender Guy. Six-foot-plus individuals, laptop users and claustrophobes were among the most vocal. So naturally was Ira Goldman, the device’s creator.

Conversely, I’m solely behind Water Throwing Girl, feeling I should have the right to use whatever features come with my coach seat, limited as they are. Imagine buying a car with a top-of-the-line stereo system and stumbling across the following sentence in the owner’s manual: WARNING! DRIVER WILL NOT PLAY KENNY CHESNEY ON RADIO IF ANY COUNTRY MUSIC HATER IS IN VEHICLE.

Until this incident I had never seen, nor heard of, the Knee Defender. This, despite being a longtime 100,000 mile a year flier on American Airlines. Okay, my Executive Platinum status means I frequently get first class upgrades, free alcohol and the right to mock and elbow coach passengers on my way down the jet bridge (read the fine print), so maybe I’m not the most impartial candidate on this matter. But I also fly Southwest Airlines, where all passengers are treated like equal pieces of cattle headed to the slaughterhouse. Nobody has whipped out a Knee Defender, although I will probably see one soon. Sales of Goldman’s $ 21.95 device have reportedly skyrocketed.

Airline rule books appear split over the Knee Defender. Some carriers ban the device; others allow it but don’t advocate bringing it aboard. Until it is deemed illegal by everyone, I’m going to have to channel my inner Lombardi, creating an offense to counter Goldman’s device. Passing gas immediately comes to mind, but I have no qualm with anybody else in the row behind me. Or next to me. Or in front of me. Or across the aisle. Casually dumping a glass of red wine on the Knee Defender offender would look suspicious, as it would require a 180-degree move on my part.

The most obvious answer? Speed. During takeoff, seatbacks must be in the upright position, tray tables stowed, blah, blah, blah. Once the plane is airborne, I’m positive I can recline my seat faster than the passenger behind me can assemble the Knee Defender. You snooze, you lose.

So I’ve solved that dilemma. And now that my brain is in full airplane problem-conquering mode, I’m ready to market my own line of passenger defense mechanisms. For starters, I will patent the Elbow Separator, a thin metal sheet that easily divides a row’s community armrest. Side by side coach passengers get an equal three-quarters of an inch all the way to Hawaii.

Next comes the Shoulder Jolt, an electrically-charged cushion I’ll wear behind my neck. Any sleeping passenger whose head listlessly flops onto my shoulder mid-flight gets the shock of their lives, no pun intended.

Finally, don’t board without my number one creation, Foot Odor in a Jar. Put it in your pocket and discretely open it when your fellow passenger removes his shoes. The quickly intensifying smell tricks Stocking Feet Guy into thinking he is the source of the stink. Note: This product is not always needed; I’ve flown next to passengers whose feet smell far worse than anything produced in a lab.

So Mr. Goldman, the gauntlet has been thrown. Sit behind me on a flight and be prepared for creations you only wish you had designed. We can settle our differences like adults, but you may have to wake me first, as I like to sleep on planes.

Usually while reclining.

Copyright 2014 Greg Schwem distributed by Tribune Content Services, Inc.
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Aerie Model: ‘I Do Like To See A Little Retouching On Myself’

Lingerie store aerie found itself in the spotlight this week after the debut of its awesome new ad campaign featuring all unairbrushed models.

We (and almost everyone else) praised aerie for resisting the urge to retouch and tweak and perfect the bodies of the already gorgeous women in the ads. But one of the women, 28-year-old model Amber Tolliver, actually admitted that sometimes she likes getting airbrushed.

In an interview with Elle.com, Tolliver said:

“I do like to see a little retouching on myself. I mean, any normal person is slightly insecure about little things on their body, and you can blink an eye and poof it’s gone [in retouching], great.”

Surprised? We shouldn’t be — models are human, too. Christie Brinkley admitted that as a young model, she “felt so uncomfortable in that body,” while Cindy Crawford said earlier this year, “I’m a normal woman, sometimes I feel pretty good and some days I’m like, ‘Oh my God, nothing fits.'” Miranda Kerr, picture of perfection though she is, told Cosmo, “Models are some of the most insecure people I’ve ever met.”

That said, Tolliver said that she’d rather work on embracing the imperfections and go unretouched than have it all smoothed over — in fact, getting airbrushed can be offensive. She said to Elle.com, “To recreate a human being using a computer process is a bit of an attack on who you naturally are. Like, if I’m not good enough or if I’m not beautiful enough, then why’d you book me?”

Other models feel the same way. In 2010, after seeing her body whittled down in a charity shoot, Crystal Renn told The Today Show, “When I first saw the photos, I would have to say I was absolutely shocked… I didn’t think it was an accurate portrayal of my body in any way. I’m a size 10, and that’s more like a size 2.” After Ralph Lauren notoriously airbrushed her into oblivion, model Filippa Hamilton told the Daily News, “I was shocked to see that super skinny girl with my face.”

At the end of the day, it’s better to see a real body, even with the “little things” that make you insecure, than a body that’s not yours at all. Read more from Tolliver’s Q+A at Elle.com.

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