Books of The Times: ‘The Personality Brokers’ Conjures the Mother and Daughter Who Helped Us Think of Ourselves as Types

Merve Emre’s book tells the story of the creators of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, which became a widespread tool for personnel management, self-help and more.
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Kristin Cavallari at Wit’s End With ”Strong Personality” Shannon on Very Cavallari: ”It Takes a Lot to Corral Her”

Kristin Cavallari, 102How do you solve a problem like Shannon Ford?
Kristin Cavallari finds herself in this predicament in this clip from Sunday’s all-new Very Cavallari. Despite being “really good at…

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10 Things We Know About Princess Charlotte’s Adorable, Boss Lady Personality

Princess Charlotte will be two years old on May 2 — but she’s got a personality way bigger than her little size would have you believe. Here is everything we know about the feisty, fun-loving little princess:

1. She’s close with her big brother, Prince George.

Prince George and Princess Charlotte don’t just look like the most adorable sibling pair — they actually are. During the unveiling of a new war memorial in London, Kate said that her two children are becoming “really good friends,” according to Samantha Burge, who spoke with Kate at the event.

2. She’s boss lady.

Prince George may have a lot of personality, but in the Cambridge house, it’s Charlotte who rules the palace. Also at the unveiling, Kate revealed that Charlotte is the “one in charge,” according to Burge. It makes sense: She is the Queen’s mini-me, after all.

3. She loves animals.

Last fall, Charlotte attended her first official playdate in Canada. (It was pretty much the cutest thing ever.) While she was there, she made a couple new friends — a little bunny and a service dog named Moose. She had a big smile on her face during her interactions with both. And we know she loves her dog, Lupo, and hamster, Marvin!

4. And balloons.

When she first arrived at the playdate, though, there was only one thing on Charlotte’s mind: touching the balloon arch. And she worked it like a pro.

5. She wears her brother’s clothes.

That Canadian playdate was a revealing afternoon! Eagle-eyed royal watchers also noticed something familiar about the blue cardigan wore to the playdate. Turns out, it was the same cardigan Prince George wore to the hospital when he was going to meet his baby sister! Sharing clothes, though, is a royal tradition, as we know.

6. She’s got a lot of toys.

When you’re a royal baby, you get gifts from people all over the world. So it makes sense that Charlotte’s toy chest is bursting, whether it’s with cuddly toys from her uncle, Prince Harry, or Charlotte’s favorite, according to her mom, Princess Kate — teddy bears, which she picked up in Canada.

7. She likes candy.

She may be a royal kid, but in some ways, Charlotte is just like all kids. After attending Christmas services with her family, she munched on a candy cane — as did her brother George!

8. She’s an equestrian.

Well, maybe one in training. While attending an event to meet and honor British Olympians at Buckingham Palace in October 2016, Princess Kate revealed that Charlotte already has developed a love of horses. Hey, if her grandmother is still riding at 90, it’s clearly in her genes!

9. She’s feisty.

Back in June 2016, just after Charlotte’s first birthday, Princess Kate revealed her little cutie has a feisty side (which we later saw on display during that playdate).

10. She’s really, really cute.

But you already knew that, right?

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The Perfect Wedding Dessert, According To You Personality

Are you having your wedding at Four Seasons or at a campsite? No matter the vibe of your big day, we’ve got a dessert for you. 

You and your partner have everything planned for your wedding: the rings you’ll exchange, the first song you’ll dance to, and the pajamas you’ll put on as soon as the last guest has left. You’ve even made sure the friend from college—the one who’ll inevitably get a little sloppy and distract from the tension between your extended family members—has RSVP’d yes.

But the detail that can sometimes be hardest to finalize—the same detail that will leave a lasting, and hopefully sweet, impression on your guests—is dessert. In so many ways, we’re living in an era after the reign of the standard three-tiered wedding cake with two figurines on top. Today, there’s more room for creativity—to serve pudding or milkshakes or trifle as the last course, depending on the mood you’re going for.

To celebrate the start of wedding season and the launch of Food52’s registry, we’ve organized 24 desserts by wedding personality. If you serve any of these, we expect an invitation. 


  • You want your guests to leave impressed
  • You told the wedding planner you were fine with crystals, sequins, and gold leaf
  • The expression “YOLO” speaks to you
  • You spent a lot of time thinking about the wedding favors

    Triple Chocolate Ombre Cake, Champagne Cake, Olive Oil-Saffron Ice Cream with Burnt Caramel-Orange SwirlLate Summer Trifle



  • The thought of a mocha-colored dress makes you raise your eyebrows 
  • You picked out your borrowed, blue, and new items five years ago
  • You want your wedding to feel timeless
  • You’re exchanging family heirlooms along with the rings

Strawberry Short Cake, Alice Medrich’s House Truffles 4.0, Perfect Chocolate CakePeach Tart



  • You instructed your mother and your future mother-in-law that they could absolutely not wear Betsey Johnson dresses
  • The color scheme includes grays, blues, and gray-blues
  • Your dream house is “simple yet elegant” 
  • You love Muji

Maialino’s Olive Oil Cake, Flourless Chocolate Cake, PalmiersBrown Butter Raspberries



  • You’re having your wedding at a barn, cabin, farm, or campsite
  • There will be dogs running around (and they will not be wearing bow ties or veils)
  • You are serving artisinal beer out of mason jars decorated with gingham ribbons
  • The bouquets and corsages are made of wildflowers

    Blueberry and Rye Slab Pie, Blackberry Cornbread Buckle, Mable’s Texas Sheet Cake, Apricot Oat Crumb Bars



  • You’re having a friend play guitar as a you walk down the aisle (or, if you’re really going for it, he’s playing banjo)
  • Vanilla cake with vanilla icing makes you yawn 
  • You’re putting Polaroid cameras on each table
  • You hired the bartender because of his handlebar mustache

    Mango-Lime Trifle with Brown Butter Cake, Pecorino Romano Cake with Candied Tomatoes, Chamomile-Lemon Cupcakes with Honey ButtercreamRoberta’s Parsley Cake



  • You always had a hunch you were born in the wrong decade
  • There will be a jukebox at your wedding programmed with “Twist and Shout”
  • You considered wearing a poodle skirt (or pastel-colored suspenders), but your friends advised against it
  • There will be a high number of “old timers” attending 

  Roasted Strawberry with Buttermilk and Mint, Icebox Cake, Funfetti CakeRhubarb Upside-Down Cake

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Which of These 5 Dating Personality Types Are You?

Have you ever noticed that people follow distinct patterns when it comes to their dating habits? Have you identified your own pattern? When it comes to dating, most of us can be pretty predictable and fall into one of five basic dating personality types.

There is no positive or negative here. Your dating personality can change, and oftentimes it will over the course of our lives. Humans are complicated, of course, and it’s possible to recognize characteristics of more than one type in yourself, but one will probably stand out for you more than the rest.

If you’re single and hoping to get into a relationship, knowing your own type and the type of those you’re meeting and dating can save you a lot of confusion and heartache!

So, which one are you?

1. The Avoider

As the name suggests, Avoiders avoid! Common characteristics are:

  • Not being proactive about meeting more and new potential partners.
  • Getting easily frustrated and giving up when beginning to date or thinking about dating.
  • “Half-assing” online dating efforts and flakiness when it comes to nailing down concrete plans.
  • Generally uncomfortable flirting or putting himself/herself “out there”.

Avoiders want to have an organically unfolding connection with partners; they hope that a suitable partner will appear without any special effort on their part. When they do date, they usually date those they know through friends, work or school. Avoiders believe (or desperately hope) love will “just happen.” They can easily find reasons to disqualify potential partners, and feel intimidated by intimacy, especially when they are being pursued.

Tips for the Avoider:

Avoiders need to stop avoiding and start dating. New thinking takes practice – you’re not likely to magically wake up one day and find yourself going on lots of dates without a concerted effort to do things differently than you have before now.

Get the support you need- a friend who can hold you accountable can be a great way to keep you on track when you feel like throwing in the towel. Online dating, singles events or working with a professional dating coach or matchmaker are all ways to jumpstart your love life. If you practice your dating skills you will greatly improve your confidence and de-mystify the process of dating. If your new actions feel uncomfortable, take that as a good sign!

2. The Dreamer

Dreamers have a very active imagination when it comes to their love lives – even when they’re not dating at all. Common characteristics are:

  • Prone to elaborate fantasies about a crush or being reunited with an ex.
  • Becoming fixated on one person, even if that person hasn’t demonstrated a concrete interest in dating you.
  • Tendency to compare potential partners to the “ideal” partner you imagine – an ex, crush or vision of the “perfect” man or woman.
  • Unwillingness to date anyone unless you feel instant chemistry and passion.

Dreamers believe in love at first sight and feel that anything less is a waste of time. They don’t easily move on if their attraction to another is not reciprocated or the other person isn’t seeking a relationship. Dreamers can easily be taken advantage of by someone who enjoys their attention but isn’t interested in being a partner. They can be highly critical of those they’re not already emotionally invested in and see their crush as nearly perfect. Dreamers can spend a lot of time frustrated by the inability or unwillingness of their “dream” partner to materialize or commit to them.

Dreamers tend to be very well suited to monogamy, since they are so single-minded about the object of their desire. The problem arises when the reality doesn’t live up to the fantasy the Dreamer has created, or when the relationship is over or hasn’t even begun – a Dreamer can stay single for a long time because of an attachment to an unavailable partner.

Tips for the Dreamer:

Similar to Avoiders, Dreamers need practice dating other people. And they need to focus on becoming their own fantasy. What are the qualities you desire in others? Are they present in you? Can you cultivate them? Oftentimes what we greatly admire in others is a clue to what we desire for ourselves. Dreamers also need a reality check – if you find yourself putting someone up on a pedestal (particularly if you’re not in a relationship), take a step back. Don’t indulge the fantasy but look for the reality of your current situation.

Dreamers should adopt the Avoider strategy and additionally, focus on cultivating personal passions in their own lives.

3. The Martyr

Martyrs can find themselves in the same unfulfilling relationships and romantic entanglements over and over. Common characteristics are:

  • Dating those who “choose” her or him, even when they’re not particularly interested in that person.
  • Getting into relationships with those who mistreat or take advantage of her or him.
  • Making excuses for their partner’s poor behavior, especially if they have a difficult past or childhood.
  • Becoming quickly committed and “serial monogamy” – can find it hard to say no to a new relationship for fear of hurting the other person’s feelings or being alone.

Martyrs can be very empathetic, which is a wonderful quality. However, they can too easily lose their own sense of self worth and diminish their own needs and desires. Unfortunately, it’s easy to justify a relationship with an incompatible or even abusive partner if you’re not able to believe you deserve more (which you do) or that you can find another person who wants to date you (you can, trust me). Martyrdom can easily lead to masochism if you’re not careful.

Tips for the Martyr:

If there is one thing the Martyr needs to focus on, it’s their sense of self-worth. If you are a Martyr, it’s probably a good idea to take a break from dating until you are able to choose your partners from a position of confidence. The goal here is not perfection – it’s knowing that you have something special to offer and you don’t have to settle for anyone who doesn’t excite you and fulfill your needs. Remember – we all deserve someone who wants to be with us for who we are, not just because our partner couldn’t say no.

4. The Nurturer/Protector

The Nurturer/Protector is attracted to those they can care for and protect. Common characteristics are:

  • Attraction to the “potential” in others – maybe an unrealized talent or admirable personality trait.
  • Often “rescuing” partners from some distress – financial trouble, addiction, an abusive or otherwise toxic relationship, or a difficult period of life such as a job loss, health issue or death of a loved one.
  • Can become involved with people at a drastically different stage of life – someone who is much younger or has fewer resources than the Nurturer/Protector to handle their current situation.

Nurturer/Protectors, unconsciously or consciously like a “project”. They pride themselves on being able to see a side or an aspect of a person that most others can’t see. They secretly (or not so secretly) hope that they can love or encourage their partners into lasting change or breakthroughs. This relationship dynamic can lead to resentment on the part of the Nurturer/Protector, who can feel frustrated that their efforts are unappreciated or don’t achieve the results they are hoping for. There is also a danger of unconsciously setting your partner up to continually need your protection and support.

Tips for the Nurturer/Protector:

This dating type can result in well balanced relationships when the person being nurtured/protected is on the same page and enjoys this dynamic. If, however, the Nurturer/Protector finds her or himself in out of balance relationships that lead to resentment, and heartache, take a step back. Look at the commonalities of those you’ve dated – are you always paying the bills, or helping someone find a new place to live, or providing a safe landing for them to exit a bad relationship? The best way to create a new pattern is to shine a light on the existing one and making a new decision going forward.

5. The Charmer

The Charmer is a highly socially intelligent person, and is generally characterized by:

  • Natural charm and magnetism that easily attracts others.
  • Feeling energized by the initial phase of attraction and seduction.
  • Feelings that monogamy is unnatural/unrealistic (at least for them).
  • A series of short relationships or no relationships at all beyond initial days or weeks of seduction.

Charmers love the thrill of the chase (or being chased). They are naturally adept at attracting many potential partners. They can be impulsive and fall in love easily and passionately for a short time. Monogamous relationships tend to be a rare or short-term event for the Charmer who is especially addicted to the novelty of new attractions.

Tips for the Charmer:

Charmer, know thyself! Society might frown upon your charismatic, noncommittal ways, but there is no one way to be in this world. The key for you is to use your powers for good, not evil. Your number one rule should be honesty, honesty, honesty. Starting with yourself. Do you want to have a lasting relationship? If so, pump the brakes and don’t fall into your usual habit of moving at lightning speed.

If you don’t want a commitment, be upfront and take responsibility for the impression you might be conveying by charming new prospects so effectively. You probably have left your fair share of broken hearts in your wake and a lot of those could have been avoided if you were upfront from the beginning (before sex) about what you were looking for.

Those non-Charmers out there have responsibility too, since in many cases we turn off our logical brains in the face of the rush of adrenaline a Charmer can provide. Just as the Charmer should avoid saying what they know the other person wants to hear (unless they mean it), everyone would be wise to take words and actions into account when our hearts are involved. If it’s meant to be, taking it slow won’t stop your relationship from happening.

So, which type are you? Do you recognize yourself in one or more of the above? Do you think I missed a type? Let me know! Leave a comment below or find me on Twitter. You can also sign up for more free advice, updates and even a free session with me at!

Francesca is dating coach, professional matchmaker and regular guest expert on NBC’s The Today Show.

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Science Explains How Your Spouse’s Personality Affects Your Career

Who you marry doesn’t affect just your happiness at home — your spouse can also play a major role in your career prosperity, according to new research from Washington University in St. Louis. This study, published in Psychological Science, discovered that it’s not only your personality that matters when it comes to achievement. Your spouse’s personality also affects your workplace success.

The five-year study examined 5,000 married people who ranged in age from 19 to 89. Approximately 75 percent of the sample included homes where both spouses worked. Researchers administered a series of psychological tests to assess participant’s scores in five broad areas of personality — openness, extraversion, agreeableness, neuroticism, and conscientiousness.

They also tracked on-the-job performance of working spouses by using annual surveys designed to measure occupational success. Each worker provided self-reports related to job satisfaction, salary increases, and the likelihood of being promoted.

While other studies have shown it’s helpful to have a spouse who ranks high in agreeableness, this study shows that workers with the most occupational success had spouses who scored high for conscientiousness in the personality assessments. Conscientiousness is characterized by a tendency to be organized and dependable. Conscientious people also show self-discipline, behave dutifully, strive for achievement, and prefer planned activities over spontaneous events.

Three Ways a Conscientious Spouse Contributes to Success

The study showed that a conscientious spouse promoted career success regardless of whether both spouses worked. It also concluded that a conscientious spouse was equally important for both male and female working spouses. The researchers discovered that a conscientious person is likely to support a spouse’s career in three pivotal ways:

1. Completing day-to-day tasks. The conscientious spouse is likely to do household chores, pay bills, shop for groceries, and care for children. This can free up the working spouse to focus on work outside the home.

2. Role modeling healthy skills. The working spouse may pick up on some of those good habits — like behaving diligently and reliably — which can boost career success.

3. Keeping the working spouse’s personal life running smoothly. The conscientious spouse reduces overall stress and promotes a healthy work-life balance which can assist the working spouse in career advancement.

What Can We Learn from the Study?

Spouses who can truly help advance your career go beyond simply encouraging you to ask for that raise or apply for that new job. Instead, career success relies heavily on having a spouse who keeps life outside of work operating smoothly for the long haul.

If you’re not yet married — and you’re ambitious about your career endeavors — a potential mate’s conscientiousness may be worth considering. If you’re already married and you’re concerned that your spouse’s personality isn’t exactly advancing your professional life, don’t run out and get a divorce with the hope of benefiting your career. Most of the research shows the stress of divorce causes decreased productivity for about five years.

Perhaps the most important takeaway from the study is that we should develop an awareness of how our own personalities affect our partners. Simply being aware of the characteristics and behaviors that may help — as well as hinder — one another can go a long way to working together as a team to reach your goals.

Amy Morin is a psychotherapist and the author of 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do, a bestselling book that is being translated into more than 20 languages.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

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